Hi guys,
so it’s decided tonight is my last night. Tomorrow evening I am staying in a motel room & am going to hang myself there (so my family don’t have to find my body). I really wanted a more painless method than hanging but after researching and researching it on CO poisoning or the helium exit bag these options are too logistically difficult for me. I feel quite happy right now knowing that it’ll soon be over, but will no doubt be extremely nervous tinorrow. I also feel extremely guilt ridden knowing this is really going to hurt the ones I love. I try to block thoughts of them out though because then I just feel too guilty & won’t do it…I have to be selfish now & do what I know is right for me. I hope they can take comfort in the fact that I will be at peace finally. Few final errands like banking, deleting Internet history & rewriting my suicide note to family & I will be done. Was nice sharing stories with you all. Hope you all find happiness one way or another, but hopefully in life not death! Wish me luck 🙂
P.s will update u if for some reason this fails…I sure hope not!
22 comments
What makes the exit bag and CO poisoning too hard to obtain?
What logistical things are stopping you? I also need to know for personal reference.
I live in New Zealand so it may be easier where your from. The only helium I can get hold of is the balloon time stuff which is 20% air so won’t work. Industrial gas places won’t sell me helium willy nilly as its dangerous & I don’t have a legit reason. As for CO poisoning my cat is too new & has that exhaust regulation or whatever thing so can’t do that. Thought I was onto a winner when I was looking at buying a portable generator & running it in my car for CO poisoning. But the smaller ones that would fit in my car are either too expensive or they are apparently safe for use indoors
Thanks for answering my question. Sorry you have a hard time obtaining the right stuff. I’m in America so I don’t know how that will work out.
I am however, going to caution you against hanging yourself. It will be an agonizing way to go and you could end up failing and in worse shape than you are now. If you do fail there is a good chance that you will suffer massive brain damage and be unable to write us back if your method fails. I don’t want to see you going out suffering. Have you considered buying the Peaceful Pill eHandbook from Exit International?
Yea I’m dreading those last few minutes before death. I’m hoping if I get it right I should be brain dead after about 15-30 secs so I don’t have to endure the asphyxiation. I just look at all those faces on YouTube etc of suicide people & so many have hanged themselves. I figure if they have I can too! I haven’t really considered buying the book although have read a lot about it. Getting the helium thing is just the big issue for me, or is there more methods in there than just the exit bag? I admire your patience & dedication to finding a peaceful way! I’m just not patient enough haha
I should only fail if I get interrupted.(or chicken out!) I don’t think this should be the case as I will be in a motel where no one knows where I am, shouldn’t be found till the following morning by when I should be well gone
Thank you. I have to be patient because my fear of failing is too strong. The peaceful pill eHandbook talks about a lot of methods with a lot of information and other resources besides helium. I’m gonna buy the book very soon. Here is reasons I won’t hang myself –
It’s harder than you think. I seen videos of people doing it. The reason some pass out so fast is because they choke off there corotid artery. But that takes a LOT of force. I remember about a month ago when I was too drunk to fear, I tested out this method, not as a suicide at the time, but as a guage on how much force it would take in case I may want to look into it later. I wrapped a cord around my neck and pulled tight…..nothing! Plus my aunt caught me in the process. Didn’t even have any bruising and soreness the next day,
Also your fear response will kick in once you start choking. If your doing it from a place where your sitting down, there is a chance you may pass out and slip out of the rope or belt, causing just enough brain damage to make you perminatly Disabled. If you want to hang from the ceiling there’s a good chance the rope will break.
Whatever happens or choice you make, I wish you the best of luck and a painless exit.
Thankyou ?I have actually tried hanging before however got interrupted. I seemed to go unconscious after about 30secs. I was very drunk which may have something to do with it though. But I’ll get very drunk again to ease the pain & give me more courage. Good luck with getting the peaceful exit you wish for!
Thank you so much. I hope we both get what we want and need
To my kiwi neighbour, please don’t do it this way. Have patience. When I do it, it’ll be 100% or nothing.
Are you sure the helium is 20%air in nz? What about BOC technical grade, surely there is a better way.
Hello Aussie neighbour I guess? 🙂 Yes the boc stuff in nz is the pure stuff. But you have to be a member to get it, I’m assuming being a member would require legit purposes for using toxic gases?? I may however be wrong. I’m just ready to go & all this other stuff seems so hard to get together. A very large proportion of suicides seem to be hanging, I won’t end up brain dead as I should not be interrupted & will use the door method to hang over so it won’t fall down or anything
Yes, Aussie. I haven’t looked into the ability to purchase gas as it’s not my preferred method. Hanging just sounds horrible. As long as you’re sure on this…
I hope it works out to plan. I hope it wasn’t the Warriors game that upset u 🙂
Hahaha, that warriors game was Just the final straw! 😉 Meh it’s not ideal but seems like it’s the best option for me. Although I was suddenly thinking oh y don’t I just buy a real old car instead one without the CO emission control…wonder if there’s any still around in the country….back to google I go! Either way tomorrow’s the day
Tomorrow it is then. If u change ur mind for whatever reason, that’s cool too. We’ll keep chatting until it’s time. I do wish u a very peaceful exit.
I’ve decided to take my tent along with me to the motel. Tomorrow I will buy a portable gas stove, light it up in the tent and hopefully die peacefully.
If this plan fails, I just get nauseous & headachey I will then continue will my original plan of hanging. Do you guys think the camp stove thing will work? Seems to all the time accidentally with campers
Good luck my friend on what ever you decide.
Not sure… Being winter and all, there are a few accidental deaths. But then u read stories of people intentionally doing it and fail. I guess Google it.
I wonder how things went…. I’ve been stalking this post since it was put up.
Still here 🙁
Same here. I just did a search for for any posts and still nothing. Hope all is well.
Ahh so I’m embarrassed to admit I’m still here. Sorry for the delay in getting back on here, partly due to being busy, partly due to having just being released from the mental hospital a few days ago! So I did go to the hotel for the night. I flagged the gas options and just took a rope, some booze & some sleeping pills. Plan was to hang myself but upon testing it the sitting down way couldn’t get myself to go unconscious. Chicken out. Took some sleeping pills & booze and went to sleep with plastic bag around head instead. Failed, woke up in morning bag was ripped off. Played around with hanging again but too scared to do it properly. Ahhh I wish I wasn’t so chicken to hang myself! I just wanna hit that cartaroid artery & knock myself out but can’t get it! Back to the researching I go. I’m still planning but have to be careful now as all these psychologists, Drs and family are keeping an eye on me now. Wonder if u guys are still around….
If you’re still here, then you’re not weak. In my opinion, you’re strong… living sure as hell ISN’T EASY!