Graphics went okay, I guess. It turns out they’ve extended the deadline to next Monday, and my tutor didn’t see my lack of work as she was busy.
However, the morning was unbearable. I was in college no less than 15 minutes when I started to have another ‘episode’, for lack of a better word. Thankfully, it only lasted roughly 3 hours. I see my doctor tomorrow morning, first thing. And I’m debating on whether to tell him about what happened today.
I can’t remember most of it, but I vaguely remember believing everyone in college were robots and were part of a plan to attack me when they were given the signal. Thus, I did no work for the entire morning, and spent the three hours paranoid of when they were going to get me and looking around for cameras and the Others.
The Angels were louder and harsher, and I couldn’t block them out at all. If I recall correctly, I spoke aloud to them at some points during the morning – which earned me confused glances from others.
The faceless figure was back also, and he sat beside me for an hour or so while emitting faint smoke (causing me to cough constantly), and he made the room cold (so I shivered none stop).
This all abruptly stopped just after 1, and everything was silent.
I don’t know if this is worth mentioning to my doctor or not since I don’t remember much of what happened, nor what caused it. Plus, Im still uncertain as to whether my psychiatrist has got inside his head yet. I wouldn’t know how to bring this up, anyway.
4 comments
I can’t even imagine how hard it must have been. Aside from few nightmares when lucid dreaming went wrong I have never experienced anything like that and even those nightmares scared me for days. I think it’s great you manage at college despite immense difficulties.
I think you should definitely mention it. I try to mention anything relevant, the doctor takes what he needs from the information and suggests treatment. I’m at the point when I don’t really care what I tell my doctor or what procedure I have to undertake, no matter how humiliating it seems – they deal with so many cases it’s no big deal to them. I’m sure you can even start talking about it right away if you wish, he can ask you for other information if needed and it’s up to you whenever you answer or not.
I’m with mato42 on this one, definitely tell him. Otherwise he won’t be able to do something about it, and there isn’t much point in seeing him in the first place if that’s the case. How you bring it out or how do you explain it? don’t stress about it… just try to express it somehow. It’s likely that your doctor has heard things like that before and will help you fill in the gaps.
I’m sorry for what you are going through
I can barely imagine how it feels
I’ve had minor hallucinations but they last moments
I hope you can get help
Good luck
Please tell your doctor. This sounds terrifying. I’m glad you made it through the day. Who cares if you get weird looks, I’m hoping your Dr. finds a good medicine combo for you so you can live your life in relative peace.