I’ve never felt so dead. You cant ever erase what you see or hear, the hurt will stay forever. This world is full of mean people. Therefore, I crash and burn, but sadly I always stand back up. I guess I’ll never learn.
I know how much my family loves me and I would never do anything to hurt them. I cannot escape this world, because loved ones keep me here. My past haunts me and so does the future. College is hard and I feel alone even though I am not. I put on a painted smile because I dont want them to know how i really feel. I dont want pity, it does me no good.
I am not happy and dont know when i started to feel this way. I found myslef looking up how it feels to die… Messed up, i know. I dont want to die though. I think. I also dont want to make my family sad. I just wish i could make the dead feeling inside of me go away. I want to feel alive again, i am sick of feeling alone.