She’s gone from this…….
to this. This is what it looks like when all the life energy has gone
I sit here crying as I watch beside me my little girl dying before my eyes.
She is shaking with either fear or anxiety.
She bearly eats anything and is so skinny.
She sleeps all day just waiting to die.
I can feel the life force slipping away from her.
The spark has long gone and now she just goes through the motions.
She feels how I feel. I feel how she feels.
Its hard to tell when it will happen, but I say to her it is ok you can go now,
because I don’t want to see her suffer anymore.
She has had a really good life. She made it to 15 which is good for a dog.
I lost her mother last year. She was 16.
When you don’t have children they are like your children and its very sad to lose them,
actually its quite gut wrenching. But least I know what to expect this time.
And there’s nothing I can do but love her and keep her as comfortable as possible until she is ready to go.
I guess that’s all we can do with ourselves too.
Just thought I’d share this as it felt so similar to how we all feel.
I just added the photos after writing this so you could see what I mean.
It looks like 2 completely different dogs, and the saddest thing of all is when I was going through my photos to try to find an earlier one of her I saw old photos of me. Happy photos of me and I look like a completely different person. I don’t even recognise myself anymore. Wow how depression and sadness and losing that life energy can make you look so old and lifeless. And I think to myself. How the hell did all this happen.
Where did I go? How did I lose me?
Anyway this is the little girl that keeps me here, what I’ll do when she’s gone I don’t know.
All I know is she needs me here now so I can’t be so selfish to leave, even though its extra painful watching something you love so much just disappear before your eyes and that’s not just her I’m talking about.
Its me too.
9 comments
I’m sorry to hear that. Pets are like family members. Good luck with it all.
I know that heartbreak all too well. I’m so deeply sorry. I bet she loves you very much.
I am so very sorry. A few years back a had to take my companion to the vet to be euthanized. It was the best for him. It was the most painful thing I have ever experienced in my entire life. He was my hiking buddy–we climbed mountains, crossed streams ( fell in some ), stomped across swamplands, bushwacked areas where there were no trails ( got lost sometimes) and he went everywhere with me in the car ( he had his own car even). I had him for 16 years. We each love our own companions in different ways. I wish I was there to comfort you.
NO 🙁 I’m sorry
So sorry to hear that.
She’s very cute. Sounds like she’s had a good, long life filled with love. You can’t ask for much more than that.
You gave her plenty of love, and it sounds like she reciprocated. Camaraderie when you’re feeling low can mean the world. It sounds like things are tough enough already, so you deserve to focus on the good times.
I wish I could offer something, anything to help. Your story of wondering how it came to this is something I’m familiar with. Sometimes I wonder if it means “me” already died, wonder what this thing I call myself now is…I posted this the other day, actually, but my username is a big personal reference to the question of “how did this happen.” I’m just…so sorry.
Thanks everyone for your kind words of comfort.
Unfortunetly it is just life and there is nothing that can ease the pain of losing a loved one.
I just have to somehow be tough and handle it for her sake and make her passing easy and comfortable.
I just hope she doesn’t cry in pain and fear like her mother did.
It was horrible. I really wish and pray for a peaceful passing.
Just this side of heaven is a place called Rainbow Bridge.
When an animal dies that has been especially close to someone here, that pet goes to Rainbow Bridge. There are meadows and hills for all of our special friends so they can run and play together. There is plenty of food, water and sunshine, and our friends are warm and comfortable.
All the animals who had been ill and old are restored to health and vigor. Those who were hurt or maimed are made whole and strong again, just as we remember them in our dreams of days and times gone by. The animals are happy and content, except for one small thing; they each miss someone very special to them, who had to be left behind.
They all run and play together, but the day comes when one suddenly stops and looks into the distance. His bright eyes are intent. His eager body quivers. Suddenly he begins to run from the group, flying over the green grass, his legs carrying him faster and faster.
You have been spotted, and when you and your special friend finally meet, you cling together in joyous reunion, never to be parted again. The happy kisses rain upon your face; your hands again caress the beloved head, and you look once more into the trusting eyes of your pet, so long gone from your life but never absent from your heart.
Then you cross Rainbow Bridge together….
Author unknown…
That’s so beautiful Mike.
Thank you for sharing that.
🙂