I’ve struggled with depression, insecurity, and severe anxiety disorder for as long as I can remember. My first appointment with a therapist occurred when I was 10 years old, I’m currently a sophomore in college. My depression comes and goes but I feel like it’s just been around for a while this time and it’s worse than ever before. I’ve never really struggled with suicidal thoughts, until just recently. The thing about it is: I do not want to die, I just have no desire to live. I don’t truly believe I could go through with killing myself, but I can’t stop thinking about it. I no longer see a therapist since I moved out for college, I suck at taking my antidepressants, and I keep all my emotions bottled up so I feel like I’m the only person to blame for the way I’m feeling. I just need someone to tell me that I’m okay. I just need reassurance and for someone to tell me what I’m feeling is normal and that I’ll get better just like I have so many times before. But the added stress of living on my own just isn’t helping my situation. I guess I just need someone to talk to because I don’t think any of my friends will understand what I’m feeling. I don’t want them to think I’m crazy or going to off myself at any minute because I don’t want them to treat me different.