Slow and steady/Dr. Visit

Today things set a good trend for me. I’m still at the point I can only go out a few days a week, but I’m working on that. So today came the long awaited and also long dreaded visit with my prescribing doctor. I was really dreading the concept of going in and talking about my issues from the last few weeks. I’ve been trying to be more honest with this doctor and we have a much more functional relationship for it. That does mean though if I had still be in the deep existential funk that has dominated the last few weeks I would have to confront him with that.

I didn’t want that to happen, which is why  I have been doing all I can to deal with it myself. It isn’t that I don’t trust him, it’s that in no way can he help with the day to day functionality/coping part of my life. Well, there is one way, and we’ll get to that.

So I woke up with plenty of time to get to the hospital, didn’t eat, but took my meds and wore clean(ish) clothes. I put my best face on and it all went as well or better than can be expected. Check in was painless. I got there in just enough time to do my pre check up stuff and sit down to read and breath.

I told him my overall progress, which includes holding down the job before it hit the skids, and going to the gym and sleeping better. I also told him the ugly about having a few extremely dark days, losing the job because of my ethics trigger. I talked about what I’m going to work on next. He said sounds good. He got me off the useless abilify and kept the rest of my meds the same. Most importantly he got me a referral to a cognitive therapist who should be within network. That’s my project for tomorrow. He said I was good for another two months and sent me off.

Considering my condition that’s great. I like the meds I’m on and I don’t want to change them. Two months is about the best I can do considering I got in with this doctor this year. The most important thing is that this doctor is responsive and we have healthy communication. I contacted his office in the first month of treatment about a sleep problem and they had me on new meds in less than 3 days. That’s the best response time I’ve ever gotten as far as doctors.

In other news I do have a decent plan for the next 5 months. I have a part time gig cleaning pools and my folks agreed to help me take a single class to get back in the groove of school. Then in August we’re hoping to get me back in school. I’m so excited about this program, I’ve never been excited like this for school. It ain’t all wine and roses, but I’ve got beer and pipe tobacco.