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Many things can happen in life,

This I know.

But what do you do,

When the pain is to much to bare.

You hurt yourself,

And call It fair,

You tell yourself that it is your you fault,

That you should have cared.

Now it’s to late.

I didn’t think it would happen to me. At all. Why would it happen? That is what I don’t understand, he tries to help, and I know he cares. It hurt him too, but why? Why does it hurt? Why am I so upset? The baby, can I even call it that, was only about a month old, wasn’t even born yet.. Does that still count as a person so young? You know what hurts the most? Not being raped by my father. Or abused by my mother. Not all of the bones I’ve broken. Not people close to me dying. Losing my child before I ever got to meet him/her. And now I’m lost. Confused. And so angry. I feel empty inside, like there is no way to keep going, like there’s no reason to no reason to knowing that I killed an innocent life without meaning to.

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scottflorida 5/29/2017 - 2:37 pm

We lost 2 by miscarriage before having our 2 sons we have today but do remember how hard it was getting past that time. There are reasons for everything, we have to try to find a way to believe that. I am sorry for your loss

kellinandrew 7/21/2017 - 2:05 am

How did you get through it?

adeblanc 6/7/2017 - 10:02 pm

I’m sitting here with tears in my eyes because that’s the only thing I can give you. I wish with all my heart that I could spend an hour with you, metaphorically holding your hand while you mourned. Websites don’t work that way, though.

kellinandrew 7/21/2017 - 2:05 am

Thank you, you have no idea how much this truly means to me. You are a saint among tainted souls.

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