I don’t really know what to write here, this is my first post, and my last. I’ve had an easy life. Good family, good school, good job. But none of that really matters to me. I tried to kill myself during my university years via hanging, but the rope broke and I took that as some sign or something. Years later I’m back in the same place, but thanks to the internet I’ve come across more concrete ways to ensure my success.
Why do I want to kill myself, I don’t even know. I’m just tired of living every day. I’m in heaps of debt because of school and I work in a steelyard where I feel like I’ll never amount to anything or be able to dig myself out of my financial situation. I guess that’s why I feel stuck. But I’ve suffered from insomnia and depression since I was a teenager, and as everyone says some days are harder than others.
My best friend recently erased my from her life. Deleted every online trace of our relationship, as if we never knew each other. And it felt to me like she was saying that she’s better off without me. And she knows everything about me, so she knows I already feel like everyone is better off.
My mom stopped in while I was writing this oddly enough, crying because I haven’t contacted my family in weeks. I feel like shit for lying to her. And the worse I feel the more I want to kill my self. So goodbye
2 comments
Have you planned when you are going to attempt again?
That sucks 🙁 I’m in debt too and I will never have a family, a home, most likely I will die alone and impoverished.