Right, so, here’s the deal:
I pulled my shit together and went back to school. Why? Because my previous career path wasn’t working. Every employer was more abusive than I could handle and couldn’t provide long term employment. That’s how we got to this messed up place.
Two years of medication, therapy, and hard work later I’ve brought my GPA up (over the last year 3.8), dealt with tons of crisis and now.
There’s a class I have to take, it’s core to my whole stupid degree plan. This semester I had two classes on a day, then the rest were on other days. The university dropped one of the classes (the one I was most excited about). Then I had to drop the other on that day. It’s called descrete mathmatics. I couldn’t do the commute or the workload.
So I structured my ENTIRE semester around this STUPID class. and the LAST DAY they are open before christmas they cancel. I know,, I should just take the drop. Who fucking cares, that’s the relationship between employer and employee in this country, but I’m seriously thinking about killing myself. Like looking up methods thinking about very quietly going into another room and taking a nice little OD. then DONE. I’m DONE being abused by fucking people who are supposed to know better…………
But no, I’m everyone’s kickball. I’m here for kicking, that’s my function. I’m supposed to roll over and take it, that’s what the submissive person does.
I’m just tired of learning new ways to take it, new ways to submit. Ugh….
1 comment
Hey if you are in school that’s good that means you are working towards improving your life, if you’ve done so much work and planned out your future, why kill yourself now? Does the class being cancelled does that mean you are completely dropped out of college? Can you pick up a different class to fill the space of the one they cancelled? Don’t give up you’ve got a 3.8 and you’ve already did so much work like I already said..