I have two brothers who despise my father as well. He had always demeaned us since we were children(the oldest[aka kuya] is at least 37 and my other brother who lives with us is 24, I am 17 turning 18 in august). This is my last year of highschool and my father continued to tell me I would never graduate and amount to anything(to this day). He left beginning of Sophomore year and left my mom with no money when we were getting kicked out. I had talks with my mother while we were adjusting to our new life, and she admits that shes okay with divorcing him and that if it means we are happy she will do it. Fast forward to today he came back with no hesitation my mom invited him with open arms. I felt betrayed. I cried and told her we cant have him here.
One time, we had an argument(my father and I) he told me to “SHUT THE FUCK UP” and that I was ugly and I should literally just kill myself if I don’t love him like a true daughter should, this was all due to me telling him to wash the dishes because my mom and I wanted to walk our dogs. My mom said I was childish(even though he was in front of my face telling me to shut the fuck up with everything he said in front of her about me telling myself to kill myself). I should forgive my father and accept it. I was shocked, I thought she had my back. I told my brothers and they all agreed that we hated our father and even told her. She refused to listen.
He almost let our family dog(that i wasnt able to take care of for some reason back then) get run over, and I told him what to do if he wanders into the street when the gate is open. He told me to shut up, I don’t know anything(Even though our brother’s girlfriend is a to be dog trainer, and I am learning about becoming a dog trainer next to video game designer), and I should take care of my dogs. My mom again said, get over it.
Today, I told my mom we are dysfunctional and we have to give up our puppy, Lightning, to our cousins cus they don’t listen to what I say. She gave me an attitude and got angry when I said “dysfunctional family”. I told her we all hate our father because he was never there for us emotionally and when we needed him and only just put us down for everything(driving us all into a deep depression to this day, and sucidial thoughts and attempts). She said, “Its all in the past, get over it.” and, “Hes your father- learn to love him”. “The sacirfices we made for you!” That word. I hate it. You didn’t make sacirfices, you didn’t have to “have” us, and you didn’t do anything for us except put a roof over our head which parents should do. My mom fully put her own cheating husband on top of her own children. I am on the verge of tying a belt into a noose and hanging myself, but before that I want to see my boyfriend in August, let go of my dog, and write my notes before I do. I want to change this mind and make sure I can get through university(i was accepted into a university I wanted to go to since I was little). I love my boyfriend, my brothers, my dogs and my friends, but if it gets any worse here I might just end up in a ditch soon just because they don’t care, and soon my brothers might too if I do this.
2 comments
Ohhh.. I wish I knew exactly how to say this but….
I can hear a lot of pain in your post. I hear that, daily, you have to endure so much but soon you won’t have to (hopefully) endure nearly as much (or at least you will have some repreave). University shouldn’t be that far off and it sounds like you have some support in your siblings and even, maybe, your brothers girlfriend.
I don’t suggest you accept what either of your parents are putting you through. Stand tall and assert yourself and remember that one day you will be free of this environment and then you will have the world at your fingertips.
Peace my friend.
Lostinside#5842 on discord if you need to chat.
hmmmm…kuya huh? i call my sister ate (:
i can only understand so much of what you’re going through, your dad seems like a complete ass for treating you that way. my dad also thought i’d never get through school, although never left he still emotionally abuses me. as for your mom.. there’s not much you can do. she’s delusional, she’s in denial and it’s not completely her fault. sometimes people can be sucked into manipulating situations and not even realize it. i know this because my mother told me i made up the story of her best friends son sexually harassing me. she also told me to get over it. so it is what it is!
also you said you got into your dream university that’s great!! if everything goes as planned you’ll be able to get away from your situation, from your parents. cut them out of your life. something i also plan to do.
best of luck.