I know compared to what some of the other stuff people have said, this might be, “lame”, but I have been at such a low point in my life lately and I need somebody’s help. I hate it at home. I hate my family. If you’re wondering why, it’s because I feel like I can’t have a normal life. I live in a strict household, I never feel love no matter how much times my parents say it to me because their words are hollow to me. Actions speak louder than words, and I have been taken granted by everyone around me. Sometimes I feel like ending it all just to teach them a lesson for the better of everybody. So basically, high school is my escape.
I haven’t really opened up to my friends about this stuff (it would just make our relationship awkward, and hanging out with them is one of the only times I feel normal) and there’s this girl I’ve been talking to for a couple of years. We’ve gotten really close, but I never asked her out. I thought I had made it clear she was MINE, but lately my best friend has been talking to her, flirting. And I feel her drifting away from me, and whenever I wanna feel happy for either of them I just feel envy. I envy him, the people around me with for the most part, normal, happy lives.
I have also been grounded for a really long time for doing some illegal stuff (I’m leaving it at that) so I can’t even hang out with my friends anymore. I’m drifting away from everyone.
I play basketball, music is also one of my only escapes, but lately the stuff that makes me happy does not outweigh the pain I feel because of the circumstances around me. I just need some help, advice that can help me feel better.
3 comments
Obviously I don’t know your age but one thing I try to remind myself is that it’s all phases and it all shall pass… being in your house isn’t where you’ll live forever tomorrow might not be the best day ever but being hopeful can definitely make it better than today
I would just ignore everything around you or that you’ve ever known and dig into your mind to find someplace no one else could ever find, hide there. Sounds like you are young, it is really really easy to be high school age hopefully you guys will you know be homies forever and ever or you will be all alone here, my friend
I’ve been there. I am much mature now. So much so that I rely on no one but myself and I’ll probably never have companionship again. Of course I don’t expect it, want it or find it useful: My best bet is to run away. I have to bide my time. I can’t stand my environment.