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It’s bitter but down it will go

by ShiSui

It’s inevitable now, I’m going to drink antifreeze, about 5oz of it like 200ml, it just sucks it’s so bitter or I think I’d be able to down more, I know “no methods” but I wonder what mixer would make it more bearable. Then immediately after down a bunch of hydroxyzine, Xanax, klonopin (since glycol takes almost up to 3 days to be fatal I wanted to be out for the first half) Whatever I wake up to (I hope not a hospital) the “what if” urge I’ve been having for the last three months will be gone, I’ve never tried this much poisoning. I’m waiting for the right time when my family is all out of the house,  idk, I’m improvising that part because I just want to do it already, my life is and has been a never ending misery of mental illness, I’m now a bitter sore, my family says it’s okay but it’s not, it really isn’t man, I’m ruining the dynamic of the family, that’s why suicide’s even a thing, because some people will fill the role.

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3 comments

no one 1/21/2020 - 8:20 pm

Google antifreeze poisoning. The first symptoms are severe abdominal pains, vomiting and nausea. This means you’ll throw up all your drugs and you will not lose consciousness as intended. Instead, like you said, it’ll take up to 3 days for the poison to take full effect. 3 days of abdominal pains, vomiting, nausea. You mentioned you live with your family. Unless they’re leaving you alone for the entire week they’re going to notice your screams of agony and trails of vomit. As for what to drink it with, I think that’s the least of your troubles with this approach. Choose literally any other way to go.

ShiSui 1/22/2020 - 1:08 pm

Even if my family finds me and I’m sent to the hospital there’s a chance I would die there, beyond saving.

LLZ 2/17/2020 - 11:43 pm

… and a $30,000 hospital bill.

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