I end up here a lot. In this place where my mind races and then slows and either way I feel like I’m not breathing already.
The story of the stars fascinate me. That their light shines on for so long after they themselves have died out. And I’m only wondering if that is because I feel like that too.
My life has had so many tragic lows mixed with all sorts of positive highs. This true explosion of light. Some days I feel the contentment and peace that comes with being surrounded by the blues and purples of the galaxy. Others I think I might explode from the stress and anxiety of the meteor showers. Regardless I always stay in the same place. I always act the same. Like the trusty constellation stars you will always find in the same place if you know just where to look.
I feel like my head is in this time frozen space. Witnessing so much and feeling so small in comparison to what is out there. Desperately just wishing for some gravity to pull me out of this place i am in. For my light to mean something to someone even if I fade out and it’s all that’s left of me.
It’s easy to wish upon the first star you see, but does anyone ever really notice the same random star twice? I think they are just lucky glances. But when the earth turns and suddenly the sun shines down upon them, all of those little stars are soon forgotten.
I wonder what else is out there. What importance there is to just this monotonous routine of always ending up in the same place with the same thoughts.
Sometimes I wonder if these beautiful stars truly die, or if they just take their own light and run away in search of something more than this.
Both escapes sound beautiful.
Wish on a star tonight, it could be the last night of the millions it’s light has shown.