I took like a duck to water to the work of the film Director Ingmar Bergman some years ago. Everything I ever felt about life, particularly the way I see things was there in his movies. Suicide was mentioned, in both his work and life, this drew me closer. He recounted a terrible tale in his autobiography which I think is very applicable to anyone on this site who might be holding hope in psychiatric help, it certainly would of helped me. In 1976 the Swedish authorities arrested Bergman on suspicion of tax evasion, Bergman had a breakdown as a result and was admitted to a psychiatric hospital, he was administered valium during the day and strong sleeping pills at night. The days passed, the weeks passed. One day Bergman asked the head psychiatrist ” Has Psychiatric treatment ever cured anyone”? The head psychiatrist replied ” Cure is a very big word”, smiled encouragingly and continued his rounds. Bergman discharged himself and got back into the real world. Do not under any circumstances put your hope in psychiatry or any of its offshoots, you will get worse not better. One disappointment too many could push you to suicide.
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It’s a bad time to try and find in person therapy anyways. Vivid has them with doors mostly closed.
I may check this guy out though.
On a better note, sometimes it does help to talk to someone that is bound to some degree of confidence. Honestly, aren’t we all posting here because the real world is too judgmental and we need to get it off our chests?