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I hurt

by fadedobscurity2

There are lots of people in this world that are physically worse off than I am physically.  The only positive thing I can say, is I am glad I do not have to endure their pain, and I am sorry they hurt.

I have neuropathy, arthritis throughout my body from my feet( in the words of the Podiatrist “you have more arthritis than a 90 year old”) to my back, degenerative disc disease, spinal stenosis in the lumbar and thoracic spine, bulging discs. Back to my feet. I have a subtalar coalition. Fancy words for fused joints. This was not done surgically. This is as a result of other deformities that caused me to walk wrong over many years resulting in the joints fusing together. It hurts like hell.

Most people that know me and my collective issues all say the same thing, “get on disability”. Yeah, well I’ve been trying for 3 years. I am up for a hearing now, but it wont be until January, with a decision not expected for up to 6 months following.

No wonder I am depressed, no wonder I would rather cease to exist than to burden my family any longer.

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