my day consists of getting stuck in flashbacks and losing track of time.
i am too exhausted to feel anything but misery and dread.
i want to tear open my flesh.
i want to see my own blood.
i want to destroy the place on me that he forced me to carve so that his name is no longer visible.
i want to feel that piece of me torn away.
i want to feel that freedom.
5 comments
Just a quick thought.
There isn’t a surgery you can get or something that can remove that or a tattoo or something?
I’m turning 18 soon, I’m going to get a tattoo as soon as I can. Laser removal is more expensive + more painful. I also have a high pain tolerance for sharp objects in the region it’s in because that’s traditionally where I always cut.
I’m sort of new here, but your words are beautiful, and I appreciate you a lot. Even if I don’t know you, and you don’t know me. Here I feel safe.
thank you so much. i’m glad you feel safe here, for me it’s a refuge when my head gets too loud. there’s something comforting about knowing that i’m not screaming into a void, and people are actually hearing me whether they know me or not
Believe me when I say I hear you. I’m listening.