This was meant to be a post about a fun game I’ve been immersed in lately, but turned into this… Sigh. Also, wow, my own life is quite dull by comparison. It’s funny. I know none of that stuff is real, and the only way to spicen up one’s own life is to go out and do more things with people, but man, introversion can be its own worst enemy sometimes. I don’t know how to really feel about where my life’s been headed. 7 years on SP now, multiple decades to get myself going to a point of proper independence and yet, I’m still stuck. This loop is going to drive me mad. Are we not all meant to be our own main character in our story of life? Most people are aware enough to not be overly vain or conceited or anything, but like I’m not driving the wheel here. Felt like that for a long time now.
Made that in February and still feeling the same. I feel like I don’t understand myself anymore. My own brain, my mind. I feel like I’ve poisoned myself, made myself dumb. I lack the words to speak,out loud but seem to have no issue plainly describing my mood to sojourners on this platform.
I just want to sort out my thoughts so I can stop this self sabatoge.