Without getting into an overly long and likely annoying story, I was drunk to blackout and decided to cut myself. So I debated for a while then got upset with myself and cut hard and fast. Immediately I thought, “oh fuck” and slammed the paper towel onto the wound. Panicking I start looking for anything to bandage this monster up with and finding nothing fast, I tell myself to stop being dramatic and it will be fine, lift the towel to assure myself that we’re okay, nope, not okay, definitely need stitches.
FUCK FUCK FUCK
More panic.
More panicking.
Look harder for wound closures or something. Throwing shit around, finally I decided electrical tape was my best bet. Honestly, probably good I was drunk at that point, I have a tendency to pass out with bad wounds. Anyways, my friend didn’t think electrical tape was a good idea but I did it as I had nothing else and it actually worked quite well, I went from a half inch open wound to like an eighth of an inch just like that. And no doctors to boot.
The other fuck up was so much drunk texting I don’t remember, and trying to call someone for a ride to the clinic for stitches, and calling my other friend for I don’t remember what. Anyways, I’m laughing at myself so have a good laugh on me today.
4 comments
You ok bro? Where did u cut urself and did you get to a clinic to get stitched up?
I’m good, it’s just my leg, no clinic. I was way too drunk to drive. lol
Great to hear you survived it. For future reference, super glue works in a pinch. If you’re uninsured in the shithole of america, or if you can’t get to the hospital for whatever reasons, sanitize the wound as best you can, then seal the worst with super glue. Not the whole thing, you might need to leave a few drainage points depending on how bad it’s gushing. But the old boxers trick works like a charm. I’ve saved thousands in hospital trips, thanks to a $5 tube of glue. And look how good I turned out.
I looked for super glue too. Might have to grab a bottle just for emergencies if that sort. It was utter chaos in the moment anyways. I won’t forget it. lol