So many nice people here. Sympathetic and caring. Everyone here has obviously gone through their own hell. But does me posting something here affect anything? Honestly… everyone here posts about their problems, then instantly there are comments of encouragement… I honestly don’t need some empty words from someone who doesn’t even know me. All you will do is say “aww thats too bad blah blah blah” then move on to the next life story and say simliar shit. Like my suicide will be your sick source of entertainment for a few minutes. Am I expected to not think about how your attention is divided between the thousands of us on here? Or is that being an attention whore? Cuz im not trying to be. Just saying its kinda pointless. I’d love to hear someone’s opinion who thinks differently and please explain why it isn’t pointless to read some words of encouragement from a stranger who says pretty much the same stuff to everyone here. Then they move on with their lives and forget about the stories they just read until they log back on. It seems like opening up on this website would just make me feel even worse. And I’m not trying to flame or troll or whatever you call it. Just wanna know what some other people think.
21 comments
I don’t understand. Advice that’s applicable to many persons is rendered invalid? It’s somewhat bothersome when people come here to copy and paste comments on everyones post, but you never even gave us a chance to be genuine. Who the advice is from makes no differences, if it’s something that can help you it’s something that can help you. Stop being a cynical sally unless you want to end up like me 😛
You can’t generalize every person with the same attitudes, I’ll use myself as an example: lately I’ve been so obsessed and saddened by people losing their lives that I’m not having a normal life. It just kills me to know about tragedies like that, and if I could I’d help everyone. Even If they move on with their lives, life changes every time and if you’re going through a hard time now that you can’t cope with, I’d put my hand in fire to assure you that things will change.
your observations seem to be centered on what it does for you, personally. in my limited experiences thus far i don’t look for answers or sympathy from others. my catharsis derives in my connection to an individual and their frustrations. it’s not about my attempting to feel better about myself, or trying to “save” someone from suicide, which i don’t attempt to do.
i will admit it isn’t totally altruistic either. i find purpose and even comfort in offering whatever thoughts i have when available. see, the idea is community. shared experiences and common circumstances.
words are only empty should you choose to never hear them. our lives are all filled with stories, and in this particular medium words are the vessel of the individual who speaks them.
I see what you mean about advice being applicable to lots of people. I just don’t think there is anything I haven’t heard already that someone here could say. I am too cynical i know sorry
I agree on the comments thing even though they are really kind.
I only respond when I can relate to something. It’s nice to know you are not alone.
I’m just hoping to give someone a better feeling. Even if just for a secon
@guipter I hate saying this because I sound like a whiny ***** but when the world lets you down as much as it has, you tend to accept that everyone else will let you down. Even though you say that you would hurt yourself for me, will you honestly remember JustTooLate for even a month after Im gone? I really don’t think so.
Most people here have already heard all the advice, that’s because there are only a few core sentiments to give to someone who’s depressed/suicidal. The reason people can benifit from what others say here is because those sentiments are continuously reiterated in new and thoughtful ways. When students are learning math the teacher uses a variety of examples to demonstrate the same process, because different people absord information/emotion differently.
Besides that, it comforts people to know that there are others who care enough to comment at all. Of course noone here is prepared to dedicate their lives to getting to know someone, nor should they be expected to, but even a few kind passing words can mean alot to someone.
@agony I think that’s nice. Since its not just blind “good luck”‘s or “im so sorry”‘s
Yeah, but to me those comments are also nice.
Interesting scar. I agree. I think i understand why people would come and post/comment here. Its just really upsetting that its not very intimate. Sure people will read the post and comment. Maybe they relate. But what gets me is that people just carry on with their lives. I know they shouldnt stop living for me (or anyone else for that matter) but it fucks with my head to think “wow, after reading my ‘story’ this person just logs off and goes to work or to school” I dont even want them to not go to work or school, its just an awful thought because the story doesnt go away for me you know?
@agony they are nice to know that people will take the time to even comment, and it might really be heartfelt, like maybe they didnt have time to write a really big comment, but sympathy in itself pisses me off. Idk why really, but when people are sorry for me, i get angry at them. Does that make sense?
Everything makes sense in a way.
Nothing makes sense and then, when you think you had it figured out you realise that you were wrong and everything is all wrong.
Anyway, what would you have people say better.
The comments over the past 24hrs or so aren’t even from the usual regurgitators.
You can please all the people some of the
time, and some of the people all the time,
but you cannot please all the people all the
time.
I personally carry these stories with me throughout the day and even talk about them with my psychiatrist. I wish there was a better system to follow up on the posts you comment on cause l’d like the idea a conversation. Unfortunately, it’s hard to keep track of the contact you incite with other members since some don’t answer back ’till finally the posts get lost on the thread where they are very hard to find.
An internet site has it’s limits and there’s no way of reaching anyone or get involved in their lives anywhere beyond the computer screen.
I never have the same “advise’ or words for everybody. I spend a great deal of time reading long posts and if in the end I see a way out of the situation they are in I’d like to bring it up. Some people have helped me with their comments and I hope to do the same to others.
When people have made up their minds about leaving this world, I like to make them feel like they are not alone cause I honestly feel for them and anyone here that is depressed. I don’t have many friends I can talk to about my depression and suicidal thoughts. These people here bring the understanding and empathy that I lack in my real life. Perhaps you think it’s sick as you stated but then again I am sick and this has proven to help me so here I am even if you don’t get why.
Posting here does affect things. Many people who are on here, in real life, dont talk about what’s been bothring them. I am one of those people. So, when I found this site and started posting and people would explain how they are going through the same thing, that definitley helped me. A lot of depressed people legitly feel alone in the real world and coming here, sharing their stories and hearing responses from people who ACTUALLY understand, feels so amazing.
Also, it isn’t really upsetting when someone responds to my post, then to 20 other. This website isn’t designed to have your own personal “therapist” who will be yours and only yours.
In the short time that I have been here I must say I have been moved in many ways by the stories Ive read. I wish sometimes that I could write and think better, give better advice, say something or comment in a way that was helpful. There are stories that I have read on here that will stick with me for the rest of my life. I am so thankful that there are those like, Scar, one_day, black swan, duke, Lucy, orangish, jmvsic, dawg and many many more that give such intelligent and heart felt comments on a daily basis. I find your posts to be so great, philosophical, funny, compassionate, insightful, and yes very helpful. Thank you all, keep up the good work. P.s. Send some love to oancu (not sure of spelling) Such a brave beautiful soul.
@Jebediah, xx 🙂
Ironic but if I was in a bad state this is the last place I would want to talk about it.
For me this is not a sick sense of entertainment.
I read to empathize and it shows me I am not alone.
Being alone in feeling this badly sucks because if you open your mouth and reach out to anyone who is disgusted by so called weak, selfish drama seekers, it only adds to the crap.
You feel any way you want to – but for me – reading these posts show there are people who will not flip the fuck out and call the burly mofos with straight jackets to send you into solitary while removing your shoe strings. Feeling safe in reading and posting about suicidality is something that is needed. Esp when you dont have a job or insurance. At least someone can listen before pulling the plug. For some of us we just need to say how we feel and the guild other put on us for being SELFISH makes us wanna just put it out there…maybe out of the drilled in guilt. Knowing from other like minded people just saying hey man I get it – is help.
On here we are all on the same level. Different things have brought us here but we all can relate in some way or another. As far as the generic polite things said, that is the outside world shit, here once again we can relate. I try to give my advice to the best of my abilities, because maybe it will help someone. Probably not, but who knows. A lot of people have good advice and are willing to share, its not just”oh you poor thing,boo who for you” and on to the next person. But sometimes words of encouragement is just what someone needs so who knows, but this place is more about helping less about useless sympathy