Just… One more day.

So, Im new on here and I’m not sure how to start this, but i guess ill just get to it.

My Life is like a Lifetime movie.

The reason I started cutting was because of my friend, Andrew. He was literally my bestfriend…. and I kinda had a crush on him. I knew that he had problems in his life, but dont we all? Yeah, I feel like a total ***** now.

Anyways, his family life was worse than I knew. I found this out when I walked to his house. I knew his parents weren’t home(they never were) because his dad was a jackass who, for all i knew, could be spendng days in a strip club. I know it’s not right to judge people, but he was a real A-class jerk.His mom work like three jobs to keep them afloat.

I walked into his house without knocking. (we always just walked into eachothers houses) It was quiet. I wasnt suspicious yet though. I went up the stairs and into his room. I said I was going to get to the point so here it is. He was there, but not in a way i’d like to find him. He was basicly dead.

I called 911 like any decent person.

I can remember begging the hospital to let me sit by him when he was in the hospital(Since Im not a family member) I remember Hearing his mom crying about her baby. And I distinctly remember screaming at his dad, in a moment of pure bravery and anger.  Probably the thing I remember the most, was that I held onto that kid forever. I literally stayed with him all night.

I swear to god music will be the death of me, because everytime I hear a familiar song or something that reminds me a little bit of him, I go into extreme anger or tears.

Have you ever heard the song Daylight by Maroon 5? it says “When the daylight comes I’ll have to go/ but tonight Im gonna hold you so close” Yeah, real tearjerker for me.

He died that morning. They pulled the plug. Im a mess. And the REALLY ironic thing that makes it even more like  a Lifetime movie is that I was going to tell him I liked him.

This was looong, but i just wanted to share, sorry.