I don’t know if I should be here (This site) Only because I haven’t hurt myself in around 5 years, but lately I’ve been feeling exactly how I did when I was 13-16 (20 now), I just don’t really want to live anymore, (Already crying) I just can’t help it, whenever I’m alone I have to fight to keep myself from either bursting into tears or picking up the knife for the first time in years, I feel so helpless and I don’t know what to do, I want to see a counselor but I don’t really like telling my life story to new people every week because they don’t seem interested or they can’t deal with me so they refer me to someone else, I can’t tell my family because they already have enough to deal with at the moment, and I can’t talk to my friends because I don’t want them to stress or hurt themselves FML just want to run away and die 🙁
I feel like a total sook reading my shit but it felt good writing it down for once…
3 comments
it’s good that writing it down could ease your heaviness. Maybe you can write everythin down from now on, just let it out on your writing (in a diary maybe).
Somehow i can relate to what you’ve been dealing.. figure out the reason that cause you to easily burst out crying, or pickin up the knife.Someone you can talk to, might help too.
It’s easier said than done..yeah, but ..just try it.
Yeah I think I’m going to try, If not here then in a diary, at the moment there’s more then one reason I randomly cry but theres really nothing I can change I just have to wait it out and try to ignore reality and pretend im a positive person =/ thankyou for talking to me 🙂
A diary is a really good idea. You can write in code, too, if you want. Find a good hiding place!