I’ve been feeling really down since the sun has gone down; not that it ever really made a difference watching the sun through my bedroom window. These days, nothing changes with me, although things and people change all around. I lie here and wait for death to come for me, eventually.
Here is a song to go with my poem –
These Days – Nico
I’ve been out walking
I don’t do too much talking
These days, these days
These days I seem to think a lot
About the things that I forgot to do
And all the times I had the chance to
I’ve stopped my rambling
I don’t do too much gambling
These days, these days
These days I seem to think about
How all the changes came about my ways
And I wonder if I would see another highway
I had a lover
I don’t think I’ll risk another
These days, these days
And if I seem to be afraid
To live the life that I have made in song
It’s just that I’ve been losing so long
I’ve stopped my dreaming
I won’t do too much scheming
These days, these days
These days I sit on corner stones
And count the time in quarter tones to ten
Please don’t confront me with my failures
I had not forgotten them
13 comments
125-140 beats per minute is safe territory. Anything less than 125 bpm will make you even more depressed.
Duke – I wrote the poem first then thought of the song because I wrote ‘these days’ in the poem; it made me think of Nico and this song. I guess it doesn’t help much listening to ‘These Days’.
Ok, but I’m not expert in cheering people up. I can’t even cheer myself up so I do listen to music that’s uplifting. There’s a scientific explanation but it’s probably that I’m dumb and the beats are able to increase my brain waves.
You don’t want to gamble. It’s bad for you. Communing with nature is good. It’s good for your soul.
Duke – The gambling bit is the song, but it surely fits my mood (the song). My poem is above the video. I do listen to less sad music at times. I’ve listened to binaural beats to induce relaxation couple of months ago but that only gave me nightmares. Yes, nature is always good.
You’re not going to die any time soon unless you kill yourself or have a freak accident. It’s very rare for a person to stay in a perpetual state like this but it is possible in certain people. I think you’ll find a way somehow to move forward but its ok to dwell on the past until that happens.
fox
“I lie here and wait for death to come for me, eventually”.
that could be a long time!!! can you get out of bed and do something?
it helps to be busy.
rocketman – I went into the kitchen and made a juice, now back in bed. oh, I know – i was going to go out today to the market but the sun went down and it got too cold and too dark, so i stayed in. Ah, was going for the poetic affect ‘I lie here and wait for death to come for me, eventually’ – although true.
duke – Yes, I am in this perpetual state. So yes, you are right; will either kill myself or live a dead life. The past hurts and it’s what got me here, but it is more than just the past that I am in this state. A lot more.
fox,
good fox! a bad day that’s all! keep busy when you can. we all need to feel bad sometimes 🙂 but we need to feel good too! go to the market and buy something for yourself to enjoy.
I think I’m in the same situation but there we are. It’s not easy to just move on. People who are predisposed to that way of life are also more likely to suffer in other areas so it wouldn’t be a coincidence that you have many problems. There have also been lots of people on here who have said the same thing and they appear to be out there living somewhere doing something.
rocketman – Thanks for being optimistic! I will go along with the enthusiasm but I feel bad EVERY day. But thanks x
Duke – I think it will eventually happen for some people because you really can’t stay in this state forever. I have those certain predispositions and vulnerabilities, so I am here.
fox,
I do too! but that’s how I give myself a break 🙂 rent a movie pop some corn.
rocketman – but those things are only distractions and 10 mins later I am back where I am- I do try, then I cry. Thank you.