I cut because I want to feel. I want to feel the sting of the blade, and then you know how you’re arm feels limp and dead for a little? I enjoy that. I like running my fingers over my cuts, and feeling the bumps along the way down. I don’t cut my wrists; I cut my upper arm. My upper arm is like a journal now, telling stories of my pain, anxiety, and frustrations. I started cutting about a week ago, and I’ve already lost count of my cuts. I hate to say it, but you know when you read that some people get addicted to self harm? That’s probably pathetic little me. My cuts have gotten a bit deeper, and I don’t mind scars. My favorite thing, though, is the blood. The blood itself is sort of satisfying. It feels as though the blood is all your worries, pain, and sufferings are in you, right? Running deep along your veins. Maybe, when people bleed to death, they were just letting out their worries, pain, and suffering. I plan to keep cutting until school is over, really. I am ashamed when people see them, but in all honesty, I like my little cuts. They were there when I felt like I wasn’t. A cut a day keeps your demons away! And hidden. And locked up. But that part doesn’t rhyme. Alright bye.
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Hi Poison. (: Aw c’mon, don’t hurt yourself. You should follow my example and go out to the grocery market and buy little bags of various types of candy. I’ve never purposely cut myself so I don’t know what that’s like exactly, but I’m pretty sure that buying chemical-loaded, unhealthy, colorful sweets is a whole lot more fun. Try it. 🙂
Lol thanks, Storm. Maybe I will go get ice cream and candy. Sounds nice.
Well, everything in moderation, whether it be the candy or the cuts. Just try not to cut deep enough to leave scars. You say you don’t mind scars, but you might regret leaving them later. Everyone has their crutch, cutting is not exactly one of the better ones, but ah well.
I also recommend buying some nice, fresh apples to offset the other sugary foods – and chocolate soy milk. Disregard what Kink said earlier – this stuff is actually good. Don’t underestimate the benefits of spontaneously giving into your cravings and then enjoying a leisurely walk home by moonlight afterwards. (Or daylight, depending on what part of the world you reside.)
Haha, his story was a riot. And I agree! Soy milk isn’t all that bad! I like it!
*high five*
I was totally unprepared for your high five. You smacked me in the face.
Shit, sorry. Strangely enough I’m stone cold sober, too. I’m a drinker but I haven’t had one tap of liquor for several weeks and I actually feel pretty good because of it. It’s nice to just relax and think in a clear, unaltered state of mind. (I’ll be out to purchase my beloved whiskey upon receiving my next paycheque, though.)
I totally agree with you. But there is a point you’ll reach whenyou don’t find cutting satisfying enough and then you start mixing that to drugs and depression and you’re fucked. Be careful down that road, total stranger. Been there done that.
I love cutting but look where it got me.
Fucking suicidal, never comfortable anywhere and in constant need to suffer. Just take care of yourself
Thanks, Wander. Hopefully you find what you’re looking for.
i completely feel all of this.
but i only cut my upper arm because its less visible
close to the armpit where people normally don’t look?
if you’ve ever cut your lower arm, around your wrist…
it feels SO much better
the blood flows more steadily
even the pain is just better somehow