I guess most people here have a reason to be depressive, either their hard childhood or a disease or whatsoever.
I was bullied all trough highschool and all but after highschool life was pretty good, from abou 16 to 19 my life was somewhat normal, had lots of relationship and sex, i was passionate i had friends, all that jazz, but then came hypothyrodism and it just went downhill from there and now im almost 25 and its been a damn hard ride with about 10% good time and 90% horrible aching depressing inside pain. For a while the huge amount of hair loss from thyroid problems was causing me quite depressive aching thoughts but now that im able to manage my hair and its grown back and take medication it should be fixed right, well no…. i just feel as empty as ever.
I wish i could feel alive again, like back then when i was fit and enjoying fitness and active and just passionate about life, now i cant even go out and take a walk without feeling like its a huge effort and whatever… im so godamn tired, but who cares right, according to everyone im just a lazy fat bastard now. I would 10 times rather work and be fit and healthy than be unemployed and hopeless like i am right now. I dont think there is any hope for me left honestly. Im in a mental coma right now and if someone forces me to get out of it i will just go hang myself.
3 comments
Hanging is super painful and tskes awhile I’m not trying to be hmfunny and maybe you weren’t being kiteral. And that’s if you succeed. Some end up vegetables or paralyzed etc. Ok that said you can get on ssd to help with money and then counseling and meds help with the inner stuff. We all feel low or we wouldn’t be on here. You cannot possibly be that fat especially if you used to be thst fit and sctive. As your body only is born with so many fat cells genetically. And there are pain neds narcotic and non narcotic that can help if it’s physical pain. Take control cuz trust me no one else is gunna come rescue you. It sucks I know
Typos sry
Hypothyroidism does sound like a cruel blow, OP, and being unemployed too, I have lengthy experience of that. At the end of my own rope and no real advice for you, just I hope you can find *something*…I’m doing voluntary work and it helps to be involved in your community and making some kind of contribution. It’s a distraction, a chance to meet people, and it raises self-esteem.