well my best friend and his family just moved into my house. the house i was supposed to start a family in. i thought maybe it would help to be around them and stay for a month or 2 but it just triggered me even more. seeing him and his kids and wife just made me think more of what i have lost. i walked to a secluded place where there is a peaceful creek, im under a tree with a very gentle rain peeking through hitting me in the face every so often. ive got over 100 depehnhydramine and have had about a 5th of 100 proof soco already. i think its finally time. thanks everyone for your support but sometimes, the end is the end.
6 comments
I wish you peace, whatever you choose. <3
I’m sorry. I wish you a gentle rest.
Hugs. I hope you reconsider. You never know when something good might happen.
Well personally I’m not too keen on having kids-I’m making the decision that my parents should’ve made in my case but didn’t. However I would’ve liked to have found my soul-mate. I used to get really lucky with dating in the past and took it all for granted…then my luck totally ran out.
But it’s a number of factors at play-I don’t get out as much as I used to, I’m not in shape anymore, I’m not in an environment to meet women and so forth. So I’d have to make certain changes in my life and perhaps I could find a decent girl again-but I dwell a lot in the past because I can’t do much to change my present.
I also hate admitting to myself though I know it’s true, that my life has no meaning and there’s really no reason to keep living. Well there are a few things I enjoy about it and that’s what is keeping me around (along with a couple of people who matter to me).
Though I do wonder if I feel more suicidal by coming to this site and reading about other people’s stories. Anyhow good luck in whatever you decide to do.
Don’t take 100 benadryl. Just don’t. It’s just a really, really bad idea and probably won’t work how you want it to.
I can’t stop thinking about you. I’m so sorry you’re in so much pain. If you’re still with us, and I hope you are, I want you to know that your post touched me. The imagery about the peaceful rain made me feel like I could find peace again in this world. It made me want to hope. It made me want to go somewhere and experience something beautiful. If you’re still here, know that your words helped me. I hope you find peace, wherever you are.