I don’t know what to do, I’ve been cutting since Fall 2013 and I just love the feeling, I hate being depressed but also love it at the same time. I recently got a boyfriend and he absolutly hates me ever being sad and he won’t let me cut, and if i do he’ll get really mad and will yell at me. I always feel like he wants to say “I hate you” if i do something wrong like cut myself. I really miss the feeling of cutting and I don’t know what to do.
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You could try and find other ways to distract yourself or let the pain you’re feeling out.
Anything else that might let you get some energy out, a work out, music, all kind of anything that might work really.
I get the ‘hate it but love it’ sort of feeling.
But the thing with cutting is not only that you risk yourself and hurt yourself physically but the effect it has is temporary, while the bad side effects might stay a while or impact you later on.
What do you mean he hates you?
He gets mad at you even when you’re just sad and not all about cutting?
Doesn’t sound right.
It’s understandable in a way that he’s mad for hurting yourself and when you resort to cutting but when you’re sad i would expect him to be more supportive.
Most NDPs (non-depressed person) have a lot of trouble understanding and relating to someone that is depressed. They just have no clue what to do. Especially younger people that also lack life experience.
So it’s no surprise that your bf is being overbearing when it comes to your depression symptoms. Being sad and crying is just something he will have to get used to if he wants to stick around.
You can ask him to read up on this condition. There are plenty of sites on the web that can help. Yelling at you is not helping things at all.
As for the cutting, I have absolutely no experience with that. I think that is something that you need to talk to a therapist about.
Me and my recent ex had issues similar to this except we were both cutters but he was the only one that would get pissed about it when I did it. I’ve been struggling with it on and off for the past 5-7 years. I suggest trying to find alternative ways.. Have you considered on doing music or art therapy to help. I’m currently studying art at my college and the classes I’ve been takeing have been huge stress busters. Or it could be something simple like if you have a close friend or family member that has a cat or a dog play with them spend someone one on one time with them.. It is defintaly a mood booster.
you can try some alternatives to cutting like punching or tearing something . you can find alternatives by searching on internet
Hi LJ, like everyone is saying I think the key is to find an alternative to cutting. I know what it’s like, I’ve (mostly) recovered from a history of self-abuse that other people in my life couldn’t understand and would get angry about. You can’t blame them, they mean well (better than them not caring at all, right?).
Here’s my alternative, which some might argue is still self-abuse but at least it’s socially acceptable, if not admirable haha. I’ve started working out obsessively. Like to the point of causing muscle damage from not taking proper breaks. The high you get from the pain is similar to other forms of self-injury. The driving force (self loathing and torture in my case) is also the same as with other injury. But the beauty is, everyone is like “wow, it’s so great to see you taking your health seriously, lookin good!” Ha if they only knew. The only difference between this and cutting is the knife. Anyway, it’s worth trying. Ideally we should be able to kick the need for abuse completely, but yeah why not get a new life while we’re at it. Little steps I guess.
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