I’m sorry

I’m sorry that I’m writing this I feel like I have no right to be here. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I can’t get a job and I dream of getting a job that works with children but I have no experience in the work place. I look like a child even though I’m 21 have tons of scars on my face and can’t get a date. My college won’t let me into the school of education because I can’t interview well and because of me freaking out because over classes because I have nothing else to live for.

I doubt I will ever been in a relationship

I barely have any friends

Having the job is all I have left.

If I’m just going to be stuck doing something I hate alone for the rest of my life then I don’t want to live anymore.

That’s a selfish dumb reason.

I’m sorry.

Sometimes I dream of being hit by a car or shot so I don’t have to live. If a meteor came down and destroyed the earth I wouldn’t care. I just want it to end.

I’m afraid to tell my parents because they think I’m doing this for attention. I’m too scared to talk to them anymore and I have to no one to talk to-I just want it all to go away. I shouldn’t have written anything, I’m stupid. I’ll be a good girl. I’ll be a good girl. I’ll be a good girl.  People have real problems and here I am just blabbing about bullshit.

I’m sorry.

I don’t want to be in this world if I have to be a failure like me.