Okay so I’ve always been able to see futuristic events in my dreams. My great grandmother could, my mom could and now I can. Here lately my dreams have been very foggy.. I keep having the same dream just the time and place is switched around. I’m having dreams that my soon to be husband is cheating on me or just deciding to leave me. I’m always even in my concise mind afraid of this actually happening. I’d talk to him about it but I’m pretty sure he’s sick of hearing about it. He tells me every time he only loves me and he goes to work and straight home to support me and he does all he can to make me happy. Maybe again it’s just me and I’m overthinking and making a huge deal over nothing. But self medicating isn’t working neither is drinking. I just want to be happy and be happy with the man I love and be excited to get married, I just don’t know what to do. I’m so confused.
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Do you trust him? If yes, it’s possible you have intimacy or abandonment issues and your mind is creating scenarios where he leaves you, so you can try to protect yourself in advance from getting hurt. If you don’t trust him you should think about why and decide on whether you can rebuild your relationship or not. If you truly do not trust him, do NOT get married as you will only be miserable and getting out of a marriage contract is such a hassle.
He’s never done anything serious to hurt me. Hell sometimes I swear it’s me and I’m creating all these problems simply because I can’t allow myself to be happy. And why that is I seriously have no idea. He always tells me he’d never do anything to hurt me. But I also heard my dad say that to my mom and he’s cheated on her their entire marriage.
It seems every second person lies and cheats in a relationship these days so I can’t blame you. I’m starting to wonder whether fidelity exists at all. Some people can be faithful, I guess you should just observe him and see if he seems to be, and watch yourself, too. Sometimes people suspect others of cheating because they know how easily *they* could cheat. If you don’t trust yourself I guess it’s even harder to trust others.
Most people say they want a monogamous relationship, but actually remaining monogamous takes work.
I’ve always been wary about that kind of dreams, because the thing is, you can never know if the dream is warning you, or if the dream ends up influencing you so it becomes a reality in the end (like a self fulfilling prophecy, but with the added dream component). That said, it’s understandable to have that fear, but it’s a chance that only you can decide to take. No matter how much you trust in the person you are with, there’s always the chance of them cheating on you, but it sure isn’t easy living dealing with that lack of trust.
Okay, thank you! I guess I know that a part of me feels alone and I hope he doesn’t feel that way and starts to drift away from me. I love him to pieces and I just can’t believe he’d want to be with me to begin with. I’m so screwed up in the head and he just deals with me and listens to me. Why would anyone want to be with me…
There you go, so even if he’s 100% faithful to you right now, your issue is that you think he doesn’t deserve you. All I have to say to that is: if you’re both treating each other right, and you have a balanced relationship otherwise, then you have to know that you are BOTH benefiting from this involvement. If you disappeared for a week without any warning, he would probably be sad, he’d worry about you, and he might be angry, feeling like you abandoned him. So, remember that you’re just as important to him as he is to you – he chose you, just like you chose him. Maybe he looks at you and says “Wow, I can’t believe it, this gorgeous, wonderful woman agreed to be mine.” Give yourself some praise sometimes. 😉
And yes MF I keep thinking and asking myself is this just one of those things like in a movie where you think something is gonna happen so you do something to think you’re gonna prevent it but come to find out that was exactly what made it happen.
Yeahh you’re right. And I know that I’m the majority of the problem I’ve always had issues with self worth and value but I guess that’s an issue I have to overcome on my own. Thank you for taking the time to respond! (: