I survived yesterday. I don’t know how I’ll make it through today.
Yesterday I just slept. Today, all I want to do is get high. Maybe that will help.
It gets harder by the day. I don’t want it to end just yet, but if things keep going downhill every single second, I might not live to see next year. I don’t want to keep having these impulsive moments where I want it all to end now. I’m afraid soon enough I will act on them.
I don’t want to hurt my family. Right now is not a good time to end it. Not now. Not yet.
When is this suffering going to end?
I’m so sick of it.
share your suicide story
Report Post
Please log in to report posts
2 comments
@ylem: it’s early morning here in Texas so I am betting it is getting close to dinner time in area of the world.
Just checking to see how you are, how 2/3 of you day went so far.
I woke up today to mist and the sky is a light steel color. I would say it is a snow sky, if it ever snowed where I am. The air is heavy, which is not that common, not where I live, which is typically hot a arid.
On mornings like this sometimes I go outside and draw little smiley faces on the Prickly Pear cactus. The water evaporate by noon, but I secretly know which paddle is smiling at me.
Just send out a little bit of positive vibes to you this morning/afternoon. You richly deserve to be happy and safe. Since I can’t provide that, I thought maybe I could provide a little bit of morning peace.
Its good to vent sometimes. I am sorry to hear that things are bad for you. I wonder what it is that is making you feel like ending it? Is it the way you feel about yourself? is it the way you feel about the world? is it circumstances in your life? I doubt that getting high will solve your issues. But it could be a little escape for the time being… and sometimes that can do us good. I usually drink beer when i am depressed and it sometimes works well. But when you are sober I would suggest trying to brainstorm about your life and try to pinpoint what it is that is making you feel like ending it. Then from there try to come up with solutions to fix those things. Life has its ups and downs. Sometimes the downs are good times to do some reflection about the big picture and make some choices to change things for the better. Try to believe that life will reward you if you get through this and keep going. Try to believe that you can get through ll this and come out a happy productive person with a lot to live for. Then you will look back and be glad you didn’t off yourself.
good luck
if you want to chat my email is my username here @yahoo