I completely get it. I was growing up and my dad was fucking crazy. I actually got abused. He used to swear at me a lot and hit me sometimes. So yeah, not much affection in my household.
Sorry that that happened to you, man.
I have had similar experiences. My biological parents were drug addicts, my grandmother an alcoholic, and my grandfather had an anger problem. So I’ve learned to get nervous when people start cursing under their breath and I have a compulsive habit of locking doors behind me.
Most of it was just neglect though. There was definitely active abuse but it was primarily just being overwhelmingly alone and unacknowledged.
Which is why, at the age of 17, I still have more daily conversations with IP’s than with actual human beings. And an inferiority complex the size of Greenland.
I had what could be considered the perfect loving childhood and yet I still hate affection, you touch me you die has always been my thought. I think there’s more to it than just past experiences, some of us are just born more touchy feely.
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I think maybe you’re a stray dog that needs some love.
Maybe.
I’m really not all that accustomed to affection. I didn’t get a lot of it as a little kid. But that’s a whinefest for another day.
I completely get it. I was growing up and my dad was fucking crazy. I actually got abused. He used to swear at me a lot and hit me sometimes. So yeah, not much affection in my household.
Sorry that that happened to you, man.
I have had similar experiences. My biological parents were drug addicts, my grandmother an alcoholic, and my grandfather had an anger problem. So I’ve learned to get nervous when people start cursing under their breath and I have a compulsive habit of locking doors behind me.
Most of it was just neglect though. There was definitely active abuse but it was primarily just being overwhelmingly alone and unacknowledged.
Which is why, at the age of 17, I still have more daily conversations with IP’s than with actual human beings. And an inferiority complex the size of Greenland.
I had what could be considered the perfect loving childhood and yet I still hate affection, you touch me you die has always been my thought. I think there’s more to it than just past experiences, some of us are just born more touchy feely.
I feel you.