To my future husband, I haven’t met you yet, and I probably never will. I’m sorry, I’m sorry I couldn’t be strong enough to have waited in this world for you. I’m sorry I killed our great love affair before it was even conceived.
To my unborn child/children, I’m sorry I’ll never get to bring you into this world, I’m sorry I’ll never get the opportunity to leave a part of myself to the next generation. Oh my dear babies I’m sorry I was too much of a mess that meant motherhood would always elude me.
To my future, I’m sorry the present destroyed my desire to see you, but I just don’t see the light at the end of the tunnel.
3 comments
he will love you just as you are, and was prepared to compliment you as your other half. .. maybe that’s why you are not whole … I think I can see it, can you..
This post broke my heart. Even in this deep darkness that you’re in, you’re still so full of love.
Same. I feel sorry about the same things, but I have never seen it that way. I mean I didn’t feel sorry for them because they don’t exist. They could’ve though, and if I had a normal life, I could meet them.
The idea of having a family is unimaginable to me. It is very strange for me to see 25-28 year old people having 3 kids out of 2 marriages etc.
Well, at the end, we will all disappear so actually it doesn’t matter that much to me if they existed or not. Everything vanishes sooner or later, and as far as it concerns me, everthing ends when I die.