TRIGGER WARNING
Well this happened today, or yesterday depending on your timezone. Im not going to link in the effort not to trigger anyone, but if you are so inclined use google.
I watched the whole video, his friend managed to record most of it. The kids mom walks in just minutes after her son shot himself in the face with a shotgun.
The reason i bring this up is because he frequented an image board i also did, and he specifically says goodbye to the people there before doing it. The reason is, that after watching it, something clicked inside me. And that is that no matter how shit i feel, no matter how hard things may seem in the moment, i dont get to opt out. Suicide is no longer an option for me, ever.
Just hearing the distress in his friends voice, and his mother reaction to finding her son dead with half a face, well, i dont know just something about the reality. We dont really think about what happens after, as far as it relates to those around us because at the time, we are so cought up, drowned, in our own pain, that even if we do consider others, it may not seem like it matters.
Well i dont know, ive been getting all the info i can and browsing /r9k/ for the backstory and watching that video, i dont know, it did something to me. And dont get me wrong ive watched tons of suicide videos, when i was a teen it was a sick passtime and fascination of mine. There was something different about this one. Maybe it was i can still relate to being a teen, not being very far off from there myself, maybe it was the reactions of his friends and parents that made it stick out. Whatever it was, i just wanted to get this out there. Its been a while since a real revelation has come along for me. I just wish it wasnt when another person who was obviously suffering takes their own life. But it is what it is.
I can only hope the family will be able to work through this one day. And i hope for all of you, if you do take it upon yourselves to look into this story, are able to take something from it. If only a grim realization of what you would actually be doing to those around you, regardless of if you believe anyone cares about you or not. I would bet most if not every single person here has someone who would miss them if they were gone. And if you dont currently, you will in the future. Anyways, i just needed to get this out of my head and felt like this would be the best place. Sorry if this brings up anything bad for anyone, ill put a trigger warning on it. Just one more day, one more breath, could make all the difference. The present is all there is, past and future is an illusion. Good night.
1 comment
I’m glad to know that this person’s tragedy has helped you somehow. Perhaps others feel the same.