I’ve been around the site for a long time now, but never really posted anything… Guess I never thought the point of it. (Reaching out) or sharing my feelings hasn’t been a strong suit being an introvert and all but right now I’m on the verge again… I’ve been struggling since a long time, first with autoimmune diseases and how I coped with it just so I can keep working since 4 years by abusing benzo’s .. trying to quit and ween off slowly now, but it’s hell. I haven’t been to work in a week(I hate it) plus the withdrawals are bad… I skip […]
I’ve always felt alone all my life where no one actually loves or cares enough to get me out of my miserable existence. Working a hopeless job with so much pressure and stress driving me towards benzos to cope with daily life, and now I can fairly say I’m addicted and good a old benzo baby now leading me further towards thoughts of suicide. My parents and brothers don’t understand, but they’re all fucked in their own right …. There hasn’t been a happy moment to hold on too since years, and all I do I fuck up and hurt the people around […]
This is probably the first time that I’ve ever posted somewhere about the issues regarding life‚ hey I’m sure everyone has them‚ but I’m atthe verge of contemplating ending it all.
My childhood was kinda great‚ until the point Ialmost got molested by a guy my dad worked for at the age of 10 thankfully I got the idea what he was “doing”. Another instance was where a distant older cousin she did molest me a little but I’m not sure its like a vague memory I’ve trapped which comes back only in bits I was a 11 year old boy then. I am the youngest […]