Having the shittiest time of my life… Does anyone care? None of my friends do. My gf (now ex gf) cheated on me. i started cutting again, and none of my friends give a fuck about me. whats the point of me still living? I wonder how much u have to drink to die from alcohol poisoning…
If anyone needs ta talk, just blow off some steam, skype me “josh burge”. I know how much it can help to blow off a lil steam.
I was at a bar tonight with some friends. They were there to have fun, i just wanted to drink my sorrows away. All my mistakes, my fuck-ups. Trying to forget about how im failing at this sick game called life. I was thinking how nobody else understands me, how alone I feel. I know some people know what Im going through, but nobody here. I was just crowd watching, watching how happy everyone is. Feeling how sad I am. Then I saw a gorgeous girl walk by. I was just checkin her out, knowing how far out of my league she is. Then i […]
The Grey
“Once more into the frey… Into the last good fight I’ll ever know. Live and die on this day… Live and die on this day…” – Joe Carnahan
I fell like this is my last fight… All the shit thats goin on in my life. Failing college, feeling the disappointment of my family. I’ll always be a failure. And I’ll die at the end of this fight. Whether the fight being the end of my college career at my own hand, or when I’m old and pathetic and withering away. I pray its not when I’m old…
I hate myself, i guess that is apparent. I cut myself for the first time tonight… I like the pain, to see my own blood. It makes me feel more human, ya know? I just want to cut a bit deeper… A lil closer to that artery. Maybe I just might end it… But ifeel like i have a couple things to do before i die. maybe i might just have something to give. But i want to just rest. sit here and bleed.
Im kinda new at this, but here ya go. Im the guy that everyone knows, and some consider their friend at school. I live in the dorm, so i got some close friends. But if i have friends so close, how can they not tell behind all my laughs and jokes, Im dying inside. I just want to scream, tell someone all the shit im going through. How Im watching everything good, everything that I care about going to pot around me. The girl I love doesnt want me, doesnt love me anymore. Im failing my classes. I try but im just not good enough. […]
I hurt her already. Tore her heart apart, the only girl i really love. I did it again. Why did i do this again to her? No, i didnt hit her, i didnt emotionally abuse her. id never do thet to a girl. im too much of a southern gentleman. but i brike up with her a second time time. i thought it was a good idea, thought we didnt work out. now this bottle cant kill the pain of knowing iv dont this. i want her back. i miss my country girl. shes what makes my life worth living. if i come crawling back […]