Yesterday was Horrible! It marked an All Time Low for Me. I had never woke up and immediately wanted to die. I guess i didnt want to face reality yesterday. That was the 1st time that I actively reached out to someone for help. Its like I wanted to Kill myself but I kept finding reasons to live. From the time I woke up at 7am until around 11pm or midnight, I seriously battled those feelings. It was a Great fight, and the best thing is that I Won; I’m still here. To some, i just did the right thing,but they dont understand the chemical […]
I know its Hard for You to Understand,
Especially with this type of Emotion coming from a Man
But the Pain that I feel,
Deep Inside… is oh so Real
You rebuddle that the Decisions that I have Made, have put My Existence into a Shallow Grave
And that Deciding to Climb Out, is the Only way to Behave
But what You see as Weakness; I Embrace as Strength
A Strength that I Aspire to Muster;Â the Morning when My Body wont make Muster
See, what You see as an Act of Desperation; I view as an Act of Courage
A Rising Plant that grows, the More it is Nourished
What You see as a […]
I have come so far! I started contemplating suicide at the age of 6! probably not an accurate number but i was that young. I am 25 now! I have cried so hard everytime i tried, but now there is a sense of peace that overcomes me when i think of going through with it. The only thing that makes me weep is when i think about the turmoil i will cause my 2 daughters. I am a great father. i wonder if i was a dead beat, would this be easier. Almost everything about my life makes me want to end it all. My […]