I am going to have to stop using this profile. My parents found out about this site and grilled me for it. Its my fault really for not clearing my history. I’ll still be on but under a new name. I’ll figure out a way to tell you guys and girls that i was Greed. under the new name. Bye. 😉
Am I going insane? This is tearring me apart? Everytime I recall a bad memory I jerk around and twitch. Other times I will lose control and start hitting myself or choking myself. Yesterday I recalled something and blacked out for a few seconds. When I regained control my hand was holding a knife to my chest so that the tip was hovering over my heart. I don’t know how much longer I can deal with this and my parents. Can someone please help me?
please?
Darkness… thats all I see. It swirls around me growing and growing. It twist on itself like a dark flaming torrent. It gets bigger and bigger. All I can see is this abomination of a thing all around me. I am horrified. “what the hell is this!” I scream. Thats when I hear the laugh, and as soon as I hear it I realize something. The darkness is… my soul. Its whats left of what I used to be. It has rotted inside of me. It has grown like my rage, frustration, and deppression. Then I start to laugh with it. I laugh and laugh. My laugh […]
All of these fools around me,
who think the world is just dandy,
don’t know the hell,
people like us go through.
We are the ones,
who are constantly judged,
by the ones who think themselves perfect,
but are really just the same as us.
The only difference between us and them,
is that we are brave enough to show it,
while they sit their and throw a fit.
Quote: Who is the bigger fool? The child afraid of the dark, or the man afraid of the light?
By: Greed
Hey guys and girls hows it going? I was on this site about a month ago after my suicide attempt. The reason i haven’t been on is because my lifes been pretty stagnant. I also admit to starting cutting on my last post. I stopped that for now, but I don’t know how much longer I can resist the allure of the blade. Even now it calls to me. It promises relief and salvation. I don’t know how much longer i can hold out before cutting again.
I’ve started too cut because i feel as though thats the only thing i can do. I can’t talk to my parents or friends. The only thing i can express myself with is my music. What the hell can i do? Things have gotten better at home. The only reason for this is that things went back to what they were before i tried to commit suicide.
Do you know what the worst part about my depression is? Its that my parents doen’t believe I have it. They say that I’m nothing but an attention seeker. They say thats what anyone that kills themselves are. HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!! Can you believe that horseshit! I mean what the FUCK! How in the hell do they know what we feel like. If Ihadn’t found this site i would have tried to again!
All of my problems stem from the family. My mother is more fucked up then I am and she won’t accept it. My step father wants me to act exactly like he did as a kid. I recently tried to commit suicide and failed. I am trying to move passed it but my parents aren’t. I feel as though I’m still at the stress center and am getting really stressed out. I almost cut today but I stopped myself in time. I need help.
All see is grey and red. My world is nothing but hell. The doctors always say ” It gets easier” IT DOESN’T! Do you know where true hell is? The hell that you can’t run from? Its in your head. I’m Greed and am Solitary Walkers friend.