today i can be sad and wonder why do roses have thorns. Sometimes the right thing to.do hurts the most. The ones who seem like they have it all together are the ones who may need the compass the most. Pain is beauty, it enriches our lives imensly, it makes love stronger, it compels us to do insane things when tough times call for desperate measures. Imagine a world with no pain. No suffering. It wouldnt seem real, some might say boring, we would take pleasure for granted. We would be weak and lack character
We would parish as a key survival mechanism disappears. […]
is.it ‘lying’ if i tell my guy friend that im in school when im actually not? i want to tell him the truth but i fear i will be judge and ashamed that ill look pathetic how i still havent graduated high school due to the embaressing social.anxiety reason. i honeslty feel awkward just letting t out on this site to random people i dont know. i fear he wont understand and even if he does ill feel awkward. these feeling dont go away ino matter wht i tel myself. i dont want to go on ‘lying’ to him mich further. what should […]
lets disect the question because it doesnt actually.make sense since it implys “nothing’ CAN create itself,.while.’something’ cannot. it fails to explain what exactly defines “something” and “nothing” . with this logic, asking why theres.” nothing instead of something” is just as invalid because it fails to explain why nothing is any.more possible than something. saying somethingcould create it.self.from.” nothing is impossible. there would.have to be something that was use to create that something. on the flipside saying nothing could be created from something is impossible. creating nothing from.something would actually just be the absence of something. if something was there to begin with, […]
swearing helps yr.tolerance for pain physical or emotional explains alot. i love getting my frustrations out through writing. cheryl from wendys yr and old.ugly.masculin twofaced ****. mary who is debatable “nicer” is a crater faced ***** enthusiist who loves grease! she acts all friendly to the customers and then to you shes overcompansatingly mentaly sedistic with her “intimidating manner” s this **** loves being incharge. i sentence her to get her eyes poked out while getting it up the ass by cheryl. these two lowlife useless pussys can rot in hell while going thru what i had to endure […]
its the most.beautiful release of human emotion. the feeling of getting choked up . a lump in the throat that can only be release through the exits of a tear shed. crying is not weakness its all the strength built up so much that it turns to.liquid solution also.know.as a tear. crying feels amazing its almost like an orgasm the way it makes u feel. but in a different way ofcourse. i love crying. just not in front of others.
besides crying idk y but i love.gettig angry i feel.so.powerful and.less.fearfull. ii love.to say what i am feeling to get it all out.
im on risperdol was perscribed it for anxiety fiirst couple daya on it havent noticed significant effects yet ..its used to treat schizophrenia which i think i may have. im hoping it.will take the edge off at.least of my paranoid thoughts.and anxiety.. hasase tried this drug? all my life.id had these abnormal fears and thoughts for example i still am.unable to finish high school do to my social fears. i have one friend who i can barely open up to unless im drunk
i have an alcohol problem already at 18. i am.very sensitive and the smallest comments.can upset . […]
well besides the hallucination part schizophrenia matches me quite to a T. ii am only 18.and ive always been withdrawn, anxious, paranoid confused extremely shy extremely sensitive (i could go on n on) child. i am convinced i maybe schizophrenic which is actuall quite a relief that i have pinpointed the real reason and explanations for my strange thinking and behvior. i feelmuh better about.myself and am.ready to figure this thing out. 🙂
how everyone else gets thru this life like they do is beyond.me. day by day by day by friggen day they make it look so friggen easy theu dont know how ez they have it frick. i try so hard an what do i have to show for it.? a slap in the facr by some 60 year old ***** who thonks she runs the show. u two faced **** fuxk u . u cost me my job and my self eesteeem i hope ur happy. i kbow im not
im not ginna lie i think about suicide.everysecond of the day. until recently ive never fantisized about killibg everyone i hate on earth.  no i dont hate anyone. in actuality i understand them.i always have. i just hate how no one understands me. i feel somewhat special how i am certain i am the only one who feels this particlular way in life. although i wish my kind easnt so godamn rare ! i hobeslty dont feel there is anything wrong with me. just the entire world is(im convinced) in a conspiracy against.me. i literally suck at almost everything if god is real he is […]
its an illusion. we will never have it.
so the manager acts all nice on the phone to my mom saying how she really likes me. lies! if u really liked me you would treat me with respect and i probably wouldnt hate you. Really wanting to quit still. i have these irrational thoughts thati cant drop. how everyone knows im awkward and stuff well now it sounds stupid but i cant change how i feel it just wont go away!  infact these feeling arent entirely irrational  because my stupid manager  called me shy and nervous a couple of times and infront of my coworkers. little does she know jow sensitive i am […]
hate nteractig withmost people just cant handle the awkwardness . no matter what i say to myaelf no mater how siber im not i cant shake these feelibgs. i a skipped.my ladt work day cause i was “sick” but really just hate my pt jib at wendys hate everyone there.mostly ecspecially the stupid manager who  is inimidating and puts me dowb not worth the money . plus i look vald in the hairnett i wear. i want to quit but i hate confrobtibg people. i hate gettig yelled at. i was so polite to them n all i get is shit. i cant even qiit […]
i fewl uswless there i just get in the way and i dont get respected. abd its too hard . i i deserve better. bye asshole cooworkers. fuck wendys dont go there they reat there employies like shit
u hurt
me. be greatful i tolerate ur ignorance. cherlyl.
u old woman. no i dont forgive u even though iknow how much ur hurting inside . honeslt y theres nothing u could have said that could have made me feel worse u useless *****
i have been very strong. i have realised that i have been tested to see if i can ivercome a barrier i could never get through in the past in this case of not letting a comment by someone get to me . a year ago i would have quit this job just like that. now i  finally have enough respect for myself tyat i can realised that i deserve  certain rights i deserve to be happy and silly  things arent gunna stop this girl this time nope i wont let it ive been through hell an back and this girl isnt going to […]
my manager is a **** where the fuck idid mypes go th ‘nice’ obe fuckeb ignorant people there are  no soci skills or feeligs to others sensitivitu only i can feel how it os fuckig **** i am am takig my anger out i dont owe no apology fuvken botch god fuck ji feel.eachday yes im slightly exaduratig  u i gorant cunts yet im overreacting but this is me getting.my anger out. try decodeig that .us christ his torture that he supsosedly endured wasmaybe half of whaany
unlike  the majority of people i actually feel sorry for adam as i can relate. i think i could have saved his brainwashed mind by the healing power of relation. i am just like him and it hurts me so much i can only imagine his pain .  adam youre not alobe. you have saved me in many ways . thankyou sincerely
fml missed work yesterday(new part time job) due to “sickness” but it was more social anxiety…. now i need to call asking when my next shift is. scared to . fml
i have changed significantly this year, some of it not so good.
I have definately started coming out of my shell this year, only a few months after my 18th i started getting into alcohol and weed, (never thought i would) as i found out its incredible effects on my anxious irrational mind. I honestly like how i have changed it means that i am not the same old me. In many ways i feel i am moving forward besides the risky sex (which i have simmered , it was ust a phase). I have made some incredible feats which i never thought i would be […]
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