isaac

Well, I’m back fresh from the Psych Unit.  It wasn’t what I expected, but better than I feared.   I don’t feel different as a person, but I am not in the same place I was…which is better.  I’ll write a little more of my experience when I’m not so tired.  (feeling a little spent right now)  I wish everyone to keep fighting and stay with us.  We are better with you than without you. (I did learn and do believe that)

talked it over and decided it was a good idea to get some outside help for a few days.  I’ll probably be off the grid. maybe it will help…maybe at least get some sleep.

I’ve felt this way before…a few times.  maybe more than a few.  sobbing uncontrollably with no tears to show for it.  or tears streaming profusely with a face as calm as death.  my insides are heavy and hurt. my feelings raw and burn.  it will take as long as it takes, i am just so sick of enduring it.  it could take weeks, i wish I wasn’t alone in this room.

Special thanks to those who showed such an unselfish interest in me, Jael85, s2419, and mimito.  Thanks to everyone for sharing your stories and feelings.  Making those connections with my own life gave me a footing to sort out my next step without taking my long vacation to nowhere.  I’ve backed away from the edge enough to take a breath.  We’ll see.

I am feeling such dread today.  My chest hurts so badly right now.  I’ve gotta get out. please everyone stay safe. i think i’m gonna need some help later.