I think my friend might be dead.. she send me “prob won’t text back ever sick of this shite bye”..
I’m so fucking worried crying my eyes out.. if I go to school tomorrow and shes not in its goodbye. FINALLY
I am so fucking scared with no way of contacting her.#help
tomorrow will decide my fate.
I hate how people say your “too young” to be depressed.. You don’t know what they have been through, you have no rigth to judge them.
Yeah but nothing has chanted since I was last on.. I haven’t cut in about 10 days now.. I developed an eating disorder since I was last on, tried to commit twice.. stopped drinking.. am yeah.. like you even give a shit right?
Everything was good, I was happy.. Maybe I just convinced myself I was? I just don’t know what to do, how to help myself.. I hadn’t cut in like three days.. Now I’m watching it pour out of me.. So now I’m going to drink myself to sleep with a bottle of vodka, maybe ill add a few pills and finally finish it to fuck!
No one bothers commenting on anything I post…
Voices..
I hear them, talking, bitching, jeering.. They are trying to make me do some bad shit.. Kill her..she deserves to die.. No she hasn’t done anything… Yet. They make me cut.. Deeper, deeper.. Let it rain you coward.. I cannot complain of being alone.. I’m never alone.. They don’t let me be alone.. Ever. Your ugly, your fat, you emo, you *****, your worthless, not good enough.. You will never be up to your mothers..”Standard”… So you cut, cut the pain away, watch it bleed out of you…
Darkness..
I can feel them.. All of them.. Their thoughts.. Their voices whisper in my ears.. I […]
I am responsible for how I treat my body. I can choose NOT to self-injure. Then are other ways to feel safe.
Have you ever felt the need to slit your wrists, to let all the feelings of guilt and depression out and then sew yourself up just to feel happy again?
I just want to be free.
I’m just trying to keep it together.
Sometimes, I look for scars on peoples wrists. Maybe we could be alike.
Don’t think. Don’t fucking think, because when you think you realise how fucked up everything really is. You realise you don’t know how you got where you are, you don’t know where […]
Sorry I’m annoying. Sorry I cut. Sorry I’m fat. Sorry I hate myself. Sorry I’m ugly. Sorry I’m suicidal. Sorry I’m messed up. Sorry I’m not perfect. I’m sorry for ruining y, I’m sorry for ruining mine. But most of all I’m sorry for being a BURDEN..
She’s upset,
Bad day,
Heads for the dresser drawer to drive the pain away,
Nothing good can come of this,
She opens it, there’s nothing,
There is only leftover tears,
Mum and Dad have no right she screams,
Anger runs down both of her cheeks.
Then she closed her eyes,
Found relief in a knife,
The blood flows as she cries.
All alone the way she feels,
Left alone to deal with,
All the pain drenched sorrowed relief,
Bite the lip just forget the bleeding.
And then she closed her eyes,
Found relief in a knife,
The blood flows as she cries.
Then she closed her eyes,
Found […]
the silent poet writes with an interesting hue
his heart battered by emotions his heart black and blue
this ink is to show just how much you mean to me but one day you will see
From pin pricks to knife slitts
alone in the dark he sits
a dark moment yet a bright bliss
the ink foul and as thick as mud
het
Well I think its time to tell people why I cut and why I think I’m depressed.
It starts off like all the rest, happy family, with money, love ect..
When I was about four years of age I was working in the farm with my daddy and my sixteen year old cousin, my dad left to get some food for the cattle, I was sitting on a lump of hay. My cousin comes up to me and starts fingering me. It was not a good experience for me and I couldn’t get him to stop. I think he would have gone a lot further […]
well the other day my friend and I were talking about self harm. She said that reopening wounds was a form of self harm but I said no its just curiosity well I’m here asking people opinion about it.
Is it really considered self harm?
Anyone who ever needs to talk I’m here most of the time <3 you can add me on blackberry messenger if you want to290B9951 🙂
Okay guys update on how I am today I suppose:
Well last night my mother called 911 on me, she said I needed help and I was too fucked up for her to be taking care of. The ambulance and paramedics arrived at my house and I was taken against my will to the hospital. I am hooked up to this life support machine, I was told that if my mother hadn’t called I would be as good as dead.. They have put me back on my antidepressants and I’m under constant surveillance if its not family its “friends” or doctors.
Yeah well I feel […]
I have been cutting myself all day and I really can’t stop I have tried but I have already cut myself 187 times today and will probably do it again. I have tried distracting myself. Or using a rubber band or ice cube but nothing is working. The some of the cuts are quite deep and some are just enough to bleed I don’t want to go to the hospital but I really can’t stop and some are bad enough to need stitches. I don’t want to tell my family but they do know that I cut. And I am running out of room for […]
What have I bought into
My world is sprilling out of control
And all that I can turn to
Is that habit in control
My life is not my own
And yet I come back time again
And yet I know I’m crucufied
I know this thing must end
And when will I but learn
When will I be justified
And when will I be free
From this sin I can’t abide
And yeat I lead myself
Into temptation now and then
And still I’ll aways be indebted
Time and time again
I just wanted to cut myself, nothing special I do it daily.. This time I went too deep the blood won’t stop I can feel the life pouring out of me. What do I do now? I don’t want to go back to hospital but I need help and I need to now .
I decided I better tell my full story so people inderstand me better:
I started self-harming about two years ago. I had an argument with my best friend and this set it off. It wasn’t a serious row; it was quite a silly one to be honest.Ă‚Â However, I think this triggered off a lot of my self-esteem issues. I had a really hard time at school and was bullied a lot and I ended up finding it hard to get close to people. My feelings of self worth vanished again after the argument and in order to combat this I started to cut myself. Not […]
When I self harm I am upset or angry (I may cry) but mostly it is not from the physical pain, but by the mental pain. I can hardly feel it when I am doing it, you just kind of black out and go into a trance and forget the world for a little. Then I feel like a complete moron afterwards when you are hurting so bad from the cut wounds.
I did not, you see, want to kill myself. Not at that time, anyway. But I wanted to know that if need be, if the desperation got so terribly bad, I could inflict harm on my body. And I could. Knowing this gave me a sense of peace and power, so I started cutting up my legs all the time. Hiding the scars from my mother became a sport of its own. I collected razor blades, I bought a Swiss army knife, I became fascinated with the different kinds of sharp edges and the different cutting sensations they produced. I tried out different shapes—squares, triangles, […]