I believe that the universe is like an impossible puzzle. When you look up into the glittering night sky, you see the echo of humanity stretched out, imprinted in the stars. It’s endless, and maddening. It’s why when you stare for too long, you feel insignificant while also believing that you live in the most fantastic creation, shaped by beautiful thoughts. Maybe when we die, we shatter. Bits of ourselves go out into the sky to become fragments of stardust among the constellations, finally beautiful.
People always talk about how they have to ‘put on a fake smile’ and fool everyone, but it’s so hard to do that. I can’t. How can you smile when the crushing weight of depression is burying you? Most of the time I’m lost in my thoughts; they’re drowning me. I’m in my own little world of self-hate and despair. I look out the window and I can see the beauty, but I can’t feel it. The snow is flurrying right now, little trinkets of white raining down on the blanket of glistening snow that already fell. The trees are dead and bare, stripped of […]
I am something broken. I was beautiful once, but I lost pieces of myself. I’m trying to find them but they don’t fit right. Do you know what it feels like to look down at yourself and cry because you hate what you see? To feel such loathing towards your own body that you have tried to rip it apart bit by bit? Forgive me if I’m quiet, reserved. I’ve got so much going on in my head that I can’t see straight. I should stop trying to fit in because really, who would ever love a girl with as many problems as me? Oh my God. […]