This place makes me feel better. I finally have found some sort of acceptance in the fact that I am going to die. It’s nice to be able to just accept. I still feel this urge to fight and scream and holler at the sky with my pleas of hope and change, but I suppose that is only natural. There really is little to no point in this post. I was simply feeling incredibly alone and needed somewhere to type my thoughts out. This probably will get my post banned or something, but if anyone is willing to take in a 21 year old dude […]
I’m starting to permanently make up my mind when it comes to suicide. I’ve had suicide attempts before and I’ve bounced back from depression at times, but this time it’s different. This time I can feel something pulling me towards death. It’s as if the world wants to take me back or as if death has fallen for me and it wants to take me home. I’m scared of shooting myself, I’m scared of waking up in a place full of pain and suffering despite the fact that I want to die in order to escape the daily pain I feel.
I have no idea what […]
There’s this emptiness inside of me that I can’t shake, I’ve been suicidal since I was 17. People kept telling me that it would get better, but things got progressively worse as I aged. I’m going to be 21 soon and I have no job, enough money to buy a gun and a family that will be heartbroken if I die. I’ve wanted to die for so long now, but the sadness my family would feel makes my heart weigh heavily.
I feel a constant stream of hate, shame and dispair whenever I remember my past. I’ve lived a long life of awkward situations and disappointment. […]