if i leave him will anyone hold me? will i feel love? will i break? will he cheat on me? does he still love me? if i die would there be never ending black and would anyone care? more importantly would he feel guilty? would he feel guilty that he raped me and called me those things or would he be angry and think it was the result of my dad, or any other abuse? why am i still here, why am i with him? if i die heaven will take me anyway despite my sins, maybe hell will consume me and torture […]
From the age of around 2-4 years old i was abused for the first time, my old babysitters son grinded against me when he was hard and i tried to get away from him but being a child he was much stronger and would not allow it. When i went to kindergarten another boy would try to touch me and i pleaded with him to stop but it didn’t end till the year was over and he had violated other girls as well. When i was five years old i begged GOD to kill me everyday. It got to the point where i wrapped a bad […]