This is not just the title of a great movie, but the thought that runs through my mind constantly. I’d be better off dead and just constantly pray that God will agree. Every day is a painful struggle, not a new start. It’s the beginning of MORE pain, disappointment, regret, and dealing with consequences of your failures. Brighter days will not come as long as I’m here on earth. I’m convinced of that, because as long as I’m on earth, that means I’m still alive.
Author
mlive4now
I’ve made too many mistakes in life and struggle to get thru each day. I believe God’s promise to forgive me, but do not feel forgiven and am still facing a dreadful future.  Racing thoughts of self-hate, guilt, shame, and worry constantly overtake my mind.  It’s a daily torment that will not end and the force is so strong that it must be silenced with a bullet!