There’s this one time that I got bullied at school for two years. Some kept on talking behind my back, my friends acted as friends not until they all got tired of dealing with me and just drifted away, my classmates, as much as possible, they try to avoid me and not include me in any group activities, my teachers…. Well, they are not helping at all. One of them even made me clean the whole classroom by myself because no one wants to volunteer helping me. I swear, I was crying so hard but those people? worst people kept on acting like nothing ever […]
Fights and conflicts shouldn’t be tolerated here. I mean, this is the only safe zone some people have (as for me tho), then some have the guts to put their rage on other people by being a racist? I mean, yes, you can vent it out here. Everything. But please do know that some words should have limitations. We all have different races here, just so you know.
Sooo, a week has passed since I was absent for classes. March will be our graduation but I feel like I don’t want to graduate. I don’t have any will or strength to do things that would take a lot of effort to do. I’m so down and broke to even get dressed and go to school. Too much toxic people keep on surrounding me as if I’m a magnet of toxics. Well, I guess this is what I am fated to be. An unhealthy INFJ who attracts narcissistic, toxic, bipolar people. What else? HAH. Everything is just so overwhelming it’s making me shut everyone […]
I have made a plan to escape from everyone and everything. Instead of killing myself, I’ll make sure I am still alive after 2 years. I want to live by my own and by myself because I don’t want to be a burden to my parents, and since I am all messed up, I want to fix myself in a new and different country from where I grew up in. I want to try residing in San Francisco since the flight fare is cheaper and my best friend (which I met online) lives in San Francisco. At least, someone who knows what I’m going through […]
So, I’ve been eating a chunk of guilt. Why? Because my mom keeps on showing efforts to bring me to a psychologist. A while ago, while we are inside the vehicle, she kept on mumbling something and pointing out places we pass by saying “That there is blah blah blah.” As much as I want the ride to the hospital to be quiet, I can’t. My mom has been reaching out to me ever since my dad told her I needed psychiatric consultation (which I overheard earlier in their conversation). I don’t know, but I am scared. Scared of finally opening up again to her […]
I know I’m just new here, but really? Why is this so complicated to use amdjckdme. I can’t even reply comments. Stupid lil shit. Myghad. Hahaha.
Damn. Just when my mom got home from work, she bombarded me with questions. Then she went upstairs and I am just crying silently here because of how much toxicity my parents release. I hope they just get a divorce. This is such a fucked up life for an 18 year old. Mom, please. Just divorce that toxic bastard. I also don’t want him in my life anymore and I’m guessing you do too. I don’t need a complete family if it just shares toxicity and doesn’t know the meaning of respect and compassion. I’d rather have a broken family if I experience shits like […]
Life sucks. Fake people sucks. Authoritative parents sucks. Insensitive people sucks. Why can’t they hear me screaming and crying for help?
I just want to be saved. Is it that hard to save people? I know I made mistakes in the past, tripped on faulty decisions. But please, give me one more chance to fix myself. I can’t take this anymore. The big lump of darkness comes at me again, and my demons are starting to be a shit. I don’t want to be a burden to anyone I know right now, but I hope being anonymous can be help for me. I am so alone. […]
I hope someday, I’ll be able to find myself
Free from sadness, free from worries
I wish to find myself, I wish to fix myself.
Hello. This will be my first entry, and honestly… I am scared. I badly needed help from a professional, but my mom just nags at me, saying that she doesn’t want a daughter who is going to have records with some psychiatrist. My father, who was with me when we went to the hospital, knew and heard what my doctor said. That I needed psychiatric consultation. But he just shrugged it off as if what I’m going through is just easy as putting first aid on a wounded knee.
I’ve been suffering for years now because of my father. Words, words just can’t describe how horrible […]