I can’t wait to get in to the mountains. As much as I hate being alone and having no one, when I am in the mountains I am at peace. Just mother nature and I. When I go it is not a camping trip. I wouldn’t consider it a survival trip either but in a way it is a survival trip. I don’t take a tent or sleeping bag. I don’t take a gun. I take something to start a fire, a knife and a little fishing line. The rest I use mother nature to provide. I build a shelter, eat bugs and berries and […]
So I have this dream on average 5 times a week. Sometimes more, sometimes less. I don’t know if it is a message of some kind or just a dream.
At the beginning of the dream I am six years old. That is how old I was after my dad took his life. I walk into a dark room. I stop and am standing there. All of a sudden a hand grabs my hand. I look up and it is my dad. No words are spoken.
We walk forward until we come to a chair that has a light hanging over it. The only light in the […]
I am so tired of people continuously waking out of my life, only being there when it will make them feel better. I posted yesterday about the hell that I went through as far as being abused. It is the effects of the abuse that I have worked six hard years on getting past that keeps people walking out of my life like some kind of fucking revolving door.
I have worked so hard to get past every muscle in my body stiffing up and feel like I want to crawl out of my skin every time I am touched. Now days I can give someone […]
I have been checking out the site for a couple weeks now, so many feeling the same way I do. I have thought about posting a couple times but really didn’t like what I had wrote. Well here goes nothing.
I was an army brat for the first six years of my sorry pathetic life. When I was four years old my father began beating me. He would come home at night and after I would say hi, let the beating begin. This went on for two years. He would whip me with a belt across my back. He would punch me in the face and […]