I heard some cockamamy stuff about how we are babies in heaven, and pick our parents. NO WAY! I was born in 1957 of an adulturous union between my 16 yo mother, and my married 26 year old father. She tried to “mold” me into perfection to make up for her mistake. When I was 19 months old she married a man 26 years her seniir, who she discoveredto be a pedophile BEFORE she married him. Fill in the blank. Fortunately, he died when I was 10. When I was 15 she finally married dear old pop. Then over the course of the next 7 […]
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I get told I’m fat. I weigh 130 with a height of 5’6.5″ I now eat small portions, try not to eat anything in between meals, and I go to bed at night and dream of the food I could eat. I get up from the table and feel so hungry. I want to eat so much more but I can’t let myself eat. I have a congressional debate meet this friday-saturday. We can’t wear bracelets…. I will be so vulnerable I’m not looking forward to it. I got told today that I work too hard and need to stop trying so hard. I study […]
So I’m new on here, but Weirdly enough I find it easier to vent to people I dont know rather than people I do know. I guess cause usually the people I do know end up judging me and leaving. Surprise, surprise.
So my family is really messed up, and I’ve been self harming for almost 2 years now. I’ve attempted suicide 9 times and, well, obviously, got nowhere with that. I’m also anorexic.
I just feel like I’m in a fish tank. I can’t move, can’t breathe, and no one can hear or understand me. I’m trapped in my own emotions and hurt. And day by […]
Hi, im Bunny and i like to meet new people, would you guys be my friends? ah, nice to know.
Well, about me? I like to act, to sing, i love going to the gym ! Friends? I dont know… looks like im a popular boy, everyone wants to go bed with me… ops, bed? i meant everyone cares for me. Oh quite the hypocrisy, no one cares to anyone, they just wanna bed you, you’re a mere toll, was I? Oh yeah… rape me please, as you do again and again.
Oh Isaque, your skin seems so pretty, can I touch it? Sure you can milady.
Which moisturizer […]
I’m new and don’t really know how to do this so I’ll just keep it simple.
I have been battling the devil known as ‘chronic major depression’ since high school (I am now 22), social anxiety, and eating disorders. Last year I was at my lowest. Almost put a gun to my head twice before I scared myself and decided to try some help. I saw a counselor for maybe two weeks before I gave up going cause she didn’t seem professional, I was being a huge burden to my parents with the money and the worry, and she made me stay away when she […]
sad enough to want death but not crazy enough to actually do it. Anybody else simply sitting in their boat and waiting for a tsunami to end it all? I’m feeling extra sad today, not sure why. I’m trying really, really hard to upgrade my job skills but whenever I sit down to study, I end up doing something else until I quit and trick myself into believing that I’ll get started tomorrow instead (been saying that since February).
I’m here, ready to study this IT junk, but once I get started, I lose all energy and desire to better myself. I pull the rug out […]
i love him a lot he too…but i become so dependent on him it disturbs his life he wants me to be independent but i couldn’t do that..i read many articles..i motivated myself to be independent of him but nothing gives success..i am working as a software engineer i am a passionate girl i love my job ..i have a variety of hobbies..good parents brother friends..but the new office environment and hostel environment makes me to feel lonely ..i couldn’t manage this loneliness that’s why become too much dependent on him and moreover he made me to be dependent on him..he voluntarily involved himself and […]
I just want to stop feeling. I don’t want to die. I only think about dying as a way to stop feeling. Every feeling is heightened. I was recently diagnosed as bipolar 2. I am overwhelmed. I am rage. I am sadness. I am despair. I am not feeling these feelings, I become them. I am lost.
I’ve been suicidal before I’ve wanted to hurt myself before, but I’ve never had images, visions, of hurting myself like i have recently. Its getting brutal, what’s going on with me. I could be doing anything playing with my sister having a fag drinking tea and ill just want to grab knife and just want to stab myself repeatedly legs chest everywhere, surely this isn’t normal? I mean I’ve been suicidal for years I’ve never experienced anything like this?
I was joyful for a few moments…I don’t even remember why…Then I thought about my life and I got so damn sad again.
I posted this question long ago and eventually deleted it.
So, what is the last song you’re planning to listen to before you die? Or, if you have a playlist feel free to share.
My entire life I waited for something some blessing some good luck never got it. I was the girl who went to prom alone you know the nerd girl no one wanted. I have dated but all ended badly. I have a set of twins by a man who raped me. I was forced to keep them looking back I regret that as well. The father does nothing so here it is I am alone raising kids I never wanted. My other relationship ended just as bad the twins father said the man I was about to marry raped the children. So I have been […]
I hope this helps. Love you all.
Really.
i’m stuck between the floor and the ceiling in my room, surrounded by the ghosts of my past. some say mean things, some are crying and some don’t speak at all. but i can see them. one is standing by the door, blocking my way out. he never speaks. one is lying on the floor dead drunk. one is standing behind me. he split his head so he could whisper to both of my ears.
one is crying in the corner. one is screaming. one is sleeping. one is tearing up my paintings. one is burning up my poems.
none intend to stop.
i go to […]
“From where you’re kneeling, this must seem like an 18 karat run of bad luck. Truth is, the game was rigged from the start.”
That quote sums up my life perfectly.
To understand why I’m doing this, I’ll need to explain a lot. Thank you if you read it all.
2012 I got out of an Abusive relationship. She beat the shit out of me over nothing. Jealous, possessive, constantly checking my phone. If I was a minute late getting home, I was cheating.
I moved into a house I’d been buying for Us. Not being able to afford the mortgage on my own, my mother offered […]
Well after another failed attempt on my life I’ve ended up back on a mental heath ward 25 miles from my own town. I cart do this again I cart stand it I cart do anythink right I cart even kill myself right. I’m lucky to be allowed my phone as the last time I was in hospital I was not. I’m Laying here thinking of away out but I don’t think it possible here and I don’t know how long I would have to stay here for.
I just cart take another day off how I am feeling it’s over 7 years now off the […]