So ive not been working for the last few days I’ve called in sick and tried to explain to my boss whats happening even though I don’t know myself… its so hard for someone to grasp when they haven’t been through it. 

I hate feeling so empty and scared. I don’t want to see anyone or do anything, yet I know if I dont go back to work how will I survive? Its so hard 🙁

Got a bus to catch on August 8.

What would be your answer for the above

First of all… I’m not going to censor this. YOU NEED TO UNDERSTAND. I NEED SOMEONE. Listen. Please, just hear me out! I can’t take being ignored anymore! So please, please just see what I have to say! Your the lucky one…all of you who are not me…all of you who you don’t have to ask for your own mother’s affection. Those of you whose own sister isn’t always planning to bring you down. Those of you who’s father actually spends time and gives a fuck about you. Why can’t I be you..? You don’t have to pretend to be someone you’re not over social media […]

I went through a lot to get where I am now. I went through hell to get to where I am now.

My story begins in Westminster Colorado. I was born in Westminster Colorado, I lived there till my 5th birthday. Then I moved to west Yellowstone Montana. After my 6th birthday I went to California to visit my cousins and grandparents where my story of depression and abuse and rape began. I was playing cops and robbers in the dark with my three cousin. My older cousin was a cop and caught me as the game was being played, He took me into the jail(a room). He asked me […]

Is it noteworthy when someone seeks out only those pornographic websites where women are being brutalized? I’m quite open-minded concerning other people’s sexual proclivities, but this one I can’t get past.

Remarkably, two years from its onset, I’m still alive; still fighting. By some odd twist of fate, I’m still here…still on this beautiful earth that once was forgotten in my mind. I’m still here to speak of the taboo disease that is depression…this stigma that is an incomprehensible sadness. The sole disease that many encounter, yet the sole disease that no one wants to admit to. The sole disease that is so easily swept under the rug. The sole disease that is too disgusting to talk about, so it’s kept to a whisper. The sole disease that is too embarrassing to ask for help, so […]

“Take a leap of faith” you said
“and leave this foreign place instead
where demons breathe and dreamers die
and pain and hatred coincide”
“and then what happens?” I replied
I couldn’t even if I tried”
You took my hand and said to me
“trust me, let’s just run and flee”
we race through chasms deep and wide
where some have lived and others died
through broken lands of dust we pass
as we walk on roads of shattered glass
just you and me against the world
where hopes and dreams begin to blur
we run for days, for years and more
and witness all […]

We are just suicidal people telling other suicidal people suicide isn’t the answer.

We all suffer

all cry

all depressed

all think

we are all just people

I hate how people think if you self harm or are suicidal your more of a special person or people don’t talk to you. Were not different we don’t have fucking three heads. Im tired of it all. The judges of it all, we cant be the same can we?  Its like people wants us to suffer even more. But for anyone out there depressed or wanting to commit suicide just know one person will always be there. If not then its me even […]

Two nights ago, i was showering because i wanted to self harm so bad and they told me to use that as a coping skill…it worked, until i started shaving my legs hard and fast because I was thinking about it…took a whole chunk of my leg off….good thing it looks natural. I don’t know what I should do for my coping skills anymore. I used to love showers cuz they made me so tired but I always have to shave in them and it just sucks to be around razors right now. any suggestions?

I need to know that there is someone else out there who has been molested, or sexually abused, or whatever you want to call it. I know there is somebody else, I just can’t find them.

Let’s talk together on Skype or Google hangouts. I need some friends to talk to. I’m 25 years old lonely…. I need some friends…. post your IDs below, I’ll add you guys, don’t forget to put your asl as well…

Telling someone that they shouldn’t be sad because other people have it worse is like telling someone they shouldn’t be happy because other people have it better.

Last night we had a fight. I haven’t spoken to you since you told me you liked me and since I told you about my cutting and eating disorder. And then we stopped talking. Why? It can’t be answered with any fairness because you decided to stop texting anyone to see who would answer. Did i text? No. Why? Because how am i supposed to talk to you after I’ve just opened up to you and after you just confessed your feelings for me. Awkward? Hell yes. It was so awkward to talk to you because YOU made it awkward but now when we fought […]

it’s one the walls on the laptop. So fucking careless. she bropke up with m~!e. I qouldnt believe it museself. She told ME , q. wll have a future. dvrtything wikk be ok. she told me. well haver kids one day. blahblahb.ah. SHE TOLD ME. everything qill be ok. she told me. all these fucked up LIEA. now imbleeding . dying. I wont make it tonit.e  I hope. maybe shel;o see. I fucking hate her. she fucked ,e again. what thte fuc,. oh the fuc,. so much fucking blood. cutting again in a bot five. qill not stop till im dead. fuk everyone ./ I […]

My mom told me that she could have killed me when she was pregnant. In my school I was bullied continuously for 3 years. I had operation twice due to some health issues and unfortunately I couldn’t complete my college. I’ve worked really hard from childhood to get my dream job, now I’m feeling like a failure. I wish my parents would encourage me and support me a bit but they always put me down. They compare me with other children from the childhood, and my mom always hit me with a stick even when it wasn’t my fault. No love from them but God […]

Why don’t people want me to just end it. They call me selfish (and there right) or cry, when I think suicidally, or act on those thoughts, but why am I wanted hear on the first place I make all of there lives harder, all I do is hold people back, according to my beliefs, after death there is less than nothing your dead, there is no mire contious you, no heaven, no hell, just gone. And, that seems like an escape to me, everyone always says death is painfull, and I’m shure it is, when I almoast diced from ODing on PAIN MEDS of […]

I cant stand my life anymore. Ever since i lost my dad my depression and anxiety have gotten worse and no matter what problems arise i always just grin and bear it act like it dont bother me. I would have ended long ago if not for my mother, i know it would just destroy her. So im forced to continue living my miserable life

Its been a while. Well not as long as for some people.I have heard stories of some people who have been tacking depression for 10 years, 15 years and I used to think to myself that there was no way I had the strength for that shit. Here I am , about 6 months into severe depression and it looks like this aint gonna go on for too long.  I even started reading depressing books. People would say that this is the worst time for it. But honestly, reading books about good people being screwed over makes me feel like I have company. Like Im […]

I’m not sorry…………………………

This is more or less a  suicide note that will never be read because I’m a ***** to put it simply.

But if I ever grow the balls to correct the mistake God, nature or what ever brought me made. But I wanted to finish this shindig on a high note.

And this is quite possible the first and last time I’ll ever mean this sentence.

I’m not sorry.

To the wonderful father I have and the mother that was never bad but I always resented.

I’m not sorry.

To my amazing family I do nothing but complain about because I can only hate someone who values me over […]