So alone. Everything is gone, I don’t think there’s love for me besides my parents. I am a failure.

Don’t wanna live cause I’m dead inside. Don’t wanna live cause I have a harsh life. Nothing but pain filled with panick attacks, nothing but falling into old traps. I am sick and tired of your little game. The game where you decide to show me pain. The place where I feel alone and I don’t even exist. The place where you…forget about it, never mind, don’t care for me, you got  too many other things on your mind. But your game is over cause I escaped, I suffered 18 years from this terrible pain, but now starts a new age cause I escaped and […]

Hi,

I used the bitcoin option on the peaceful pill handbook website to order a 24-month subscription to the book. It was my first bitcoin payment ever. I see that the bitcoins have left my wallet, and the site notified me that the payment was successful. However I got no instructions on what to do next in order to read the book. All I was given was some kind of code which I have no idea how to use. I’ve emailed the site’s contact address, but didn’t receive a reply so far. Could you please help me? I’m not sure if I didn’t get scammed or […]

A year ago I wanted to kill myself and I told myself I had to give it a year to see if that feeling remained. The time is up and it’s still what I want, I have a plan in place to make sure my cat is taken care of and that police/paramedics are who find the body. It’s a really good plan. But it is so frustrating to not be able to find any kind of solid information or resources on how to do get it done correctly. The things I found via Google seem so out of reach because they involve things I […]

“And the rage destroy our peace,

We wish and wish the same shit for decades,

Until death arrives and collapse our world,

And take our lifes,

The emptiness, the memories,

Burning shadows of silence,

Voices inside my hell that scream and still believe,

But, it’s too late.

The rage still after life…”

Ok so I’m 27, I live in the UK, so there’s no guns (would be my preferred way) anyways my life is so bad, I have an extreme foot fetish where it replaces all normal sexual preferences, I only find the feet sexy, girls legs, butts, etc mildly attractive but not proper arousal.

This is causing me huge stress as I can’t have normal sex with a girl without feet, it’s caused two girls to leave me, & now there’s one girl I’m in love with who loves me back & definitely wants to get shagged but I know she hates feet & would be extremely […]

Today I realised why I always assume people hate me and why I try and make them hate me.
I realised that I’d rather people feel something towards me, be that hatred or otherwise, than be indifferent towards me.
I think hatred is one of the easiest emotions to express too, and so that’s why I chose it.
I’d find it a lot easier to tell someone that I hate them than I love them, for example.
But I always used to fall out with people over stupid things and I think that was my attempt at making them hate me because I had started […]

I think overdosing will be the best method. A bunch of sleep pills and a shit ton of vodka, I have a high tolerance for lq I know I’ll throw most of it up but hey here’s to hopping.. Cheers

Hi,

I haven’t posted in a long time. Although I have felt suicidal the hole time I have been waiting for “the right time” . I chose June 11th the day before my Birthday. the only problem w/ that is I really want to do It this weekend. I  am not getting any better. I’ve been doing everything I’m supposed to do. But I feel like I don’t belong. My own brother is trying to bring me down and making me feel like i’m not doing the right thing, even tho I have been sober for 8 months and following the program of the group home […]

Help me. I’m drowning.

Not because I want to – I simply can’t keep living. It’s not even so much that it hurts (though it does, especially when I stop drowning it out with anything fictional), but because I lack some sort of characteristic needed for life. I don’t have the will to live or rather for actions needed to survive. I can’t finish university – it’s been five years since I graduated high school and I went straight to college, yet after changing my major I have spent the last three years unable to finish even the first course of my studies. I’ve had maybe five job interviews […]

Loved someone with every ounce of your existence? And despite how you feel, have that person and people around you tell you that it isn’t really love. I admit it I am controlling, not because I had no control over my childhood or anything like that. But because I want to control the pain that I will feel. I didn’t and still don’t want to feel any type of love for anyone because I don’t want to hurt. I never trusted anyone I built the biggest of walls and yet one person got through to me. It was magic it was love it was the […]

I found this cite a few days ago. I keep thinking about what to write and I’ve decided to just start with my thoughts. I was google-ing suicide quotes and depression quotes when I found this cite. Do I think about suicide? I’m not sure. I don’t think I actually want to die. I just want to cause self – harm. I remember being 15 and talking to a psychologist because so much had happened and my way out of things was with a razor. I remember liking the feeling of running it across my wrists or thighs and watching blood drip. I never did […]

Empty means containing nothing, according to the dictionary. It’s the feeling that I have right now. It’s weird. I’m in my house, but i’m not alone. I have my daughter sitting next to me watching a movie on her iPad while I sit on my couch typing these words. She’s too little to understand my feelings and body language. I have messages on my phone that i’ve looked at, but can’t seem to reply. I have close friends that want to hang out or come over and call it a movie night…but why do I just want to be alone? I’ve thought about over-dosing today…actually […]

I’ve been extremely tired all day. All i’ve wanted to do is sleep. Sleep and not wake up. Just dream the night away. If it happens to be a nightmare…it’s okay because i’ve master lucid dreams. But it’s 1:25AM and I’m wide awake. The part before drifting away to the dream state is the hardest for me. It’s when all these thoughts come to my mind. All these people that have hurt me. All the words I’ve been told. All this negativity I seem to reminisce about. I want it all to go away! I hate hurting because of all the BS i’ve caused myself. […]

I just hate my life….I do not LIKE anything.

I hate it so much and tried suicide so much I lost count.

I hate me…….I feel like there is no hope and no help.

This has been going on over 30 years and I am worse than ever

FML!!!!!!!!

There are a long list of things we are not allowed to say, and feelings we are not allowed to feel.  Isn’t that true my fellow slaves?  You did know you’re slaves, right?  From the moment you’re born you are a slave to your parents and to this society.  That is why what we say and feel must be regulated.  That is why dissenters must be outcast as “evil” horrible people.  Because in order to keep the system going, we can’t have dissent.  Dissent wakes people’s minds up, and awake people rebel, and what society fears most, is rebellion.  “Being born is like being kidnapped […]

Hi to all,

Well, it has been 14 months since got sick physically – could not exercise or do anything after a while; things escalated and got worse every day. Now just breathing is so hard, and can’t even move without having terrible chest tightness, stomach aches, dry mouth and other stuff.

Docs first checked me for some general illnesses and after they found not a thing; it had to be in my head, of course.

The thing is not like many here may have; I have a physical sickness which is killing me and the docs can’t find what seems to be the problem, and then the […]

http://www.antipsychiatry.org/suicide.htm

One reason some oppose the right to commit suicide is theological belief that is sometimes expressed this way: “God gave you life, and only God has the right to take life from you.” Using this reasoning to justify interfering with a person’s right to commit suicide is imposing religious beliefs on people who may not share those beliefs. In America where we supposedly have freedom of (and from) religion, this is wrong.

Another reason some people believe it is ethical to interfere with a person’s right to think about or commit suicide is belief in mental illness. But a so-called diagnosis of “mental illness” is a […]

I’m new on here. Wow good job stating the obvious I joined because I’m kind of on edge right now for pretty much no reason. I’m worrying myself with how I’m thinking and I dont really know what to do.