I finally found a way to end my miserable existence and I could not be happier. My mother knows how depressed I have been and wanted to “Just get away from things” so she has signed me up for a hiking camp. I could not be more excited. We’re going to go cliff-climbing and I can’t wait. I plan to jump from one of those cliffs. My depression cannot be cured with words or actions, only miracles. I can’t wait to pass onto the final frontier. I no longer care if that will be endless nothingness or a vast new dimension for my broken soul. […]

idk if venom was a boy or girl, i assume girl, has anyone seen her? haven’t been on here too much lately but ive noticed i havent seen any posts of hers

I’m 26. Bipolar, student, mom. When I was a teenager my father shot himself and survived(thankfully) in our home. Every since that day my life change forever. I wasn’t the happy girl anymore. I thought as I got older things would get better, but my husband recently left us. I was abused in just about every way, but I am beyond sad over this loss. I constantly think about death and suicide. I also feel like a horrible parent. I wanted nothing more than to have a happy family for my son, but our home life was a nightmare. But now I have no one […]

Hey! This letter is for Mary Ann(Marika)in Finland.
I hope your reading this.

So much has change since i met you here around a year ago.

I understand your reasons and motives very well, but i feel you asked the wrong person for advice. Then again so did Alex from Scotland.

But ultimately Marika you were right. We all at the end of the day do want to be “free” to decide our of destiny. I say “free” in caps, because in reality we do not have any REAL freedom. All is under the controll of god.

And Marika as much as i hate to say this, you may […]

How does one cope with the monotony of life. Dead end jobs. Pointless relationships. Living for the weekend..

Is it really fair to say I want to commit suicide, if I feel like I’ve never really lived at all.

I thought giving up smoking drinking and drugs, while taking on exercise and healthy eating would improve my life but no. The little joy I had left in my life is gone.

I start work in a few hours, haven’t slept in a few days thinking about this. Is tonight the night. I’ve picked up the knife so many times already and pussied out, but this time I can […]

Sorry I’m annoying. Sorry I cut. Sorry I’m fat. Sorry I hate myself. Sorry I’m ugly. Sorry I’m suicidal. Sorry I’m messed up. Sorry I’m not perfect. I’m sorry for ruining y, I’m sorry for ruining mine. But most of all I’m sorry for being a BURDEN..

Fuck what can I say I’m surrounded by people yet alone, I’ve almost always been alone, I loved once but lost the girl of my dreams to suicide, she broke up with me because of my drinking, I been in maximum security mental wards, Rehabs, churches, I’ve recently started fresh got a new job go to the gym 4 days a week I live in a great area, Yet suicide seems to be my way of doing everyone a favour and shit I’ve tried, i bear wrist scars, I tried hanging myself more than once, I slept on cliff faces yet by some way I’m […]

Exactly what is the point of living? If all I get called is “fat,ugly,stupid,a nobody,a whore,a slut,a *****”?? Like really I’ve cut myself exactly 10 times bleeding like hell still no death?? I would cut my throat open but my heart keeps telling me “just wait and soon things will be better just you wait” well guess what?? Nothing it wouldn’t bother me to do it right now at 2:51 am no problem at all once again my heart stops me but still nothing everybody left cause they thing I’m crazy so now I’m stuck with some stupid ass therapist!! And you know what hurts […]

I don’t really know what to do. I’m not looking for other stories, i’m not looking to hear “things will get better”. I’m just looking for someone to talk to, simply, because i can’t afford a “professional”. In my experience, i have gone to see someone in the past, but they have not at all been helpful. I’m not sure what to do, i don’t really see what there is to life anymore to be honest. I’m not trying to get attention, i am seeking options. Maybe i can meet someone who can help me out, or i’ll just hear what i have been hearing […]

It’s funny really, the feelings I have. The sickening revolt I carry towards myself and everything else, hiding it behind a carefully placed mask. It’s funny because no one suspects a thing. Someone like me, the innocent child, the student who gets good grades, the one who is a Jesus-freak, the one who forgives so easily, can feel like this. Because I’m not any of those things….not since I’ve lost myself to a black hole of nothingness. It is the only thing people can see, the external me, while everything on the inside is bleeding so so slowly.

Why? I can’t even place words as to why I […]

I learned a lot about falling in love when I fell out of love
I learned a lot about being a friend when I was alone
Well I played with fire, I burned it all down
I’ve made more mistakes than you can count

Well I played with fire, I burned it all down
I’ve made more mistakes than you can count

She Wanted To Make Out With Me So We Did Then After She Said She Loves Me She Makes Out With Another Guy Right Infront Of Me…. Give Me One Good Reason Why I Shouldn’t Pull The Plug…. 

-FawkItAll98

i tried drowning myself so many times today…i have a party at huricane harbor tomorrow so i wont be on till late…ITS HOT AS BALLS IN HERE OHMYGOD. it feels like satin pissed lava on my shoulders uuuuuhg….bye, goodnight nathen <3

I get up each day, not sure why I’m still here. I don’t want a future, I have nothing to live for. People love me, but I don’t feel like they do, you know? I feel pointless and a waste of space and I know deep in my heart that everyone would be better off without me.

I mean, I’m always going to be alone, I’m never going to fulfill any of my hopes or dreams. I have nothing. No reasons. Whereas I have plenty of reasons to go: I’m fat, I’m ugly, I’m annoying, none of my friends actually like me, I screw […]

I’ve been reading things that I wrote about two and half years ago when I found :

Deep inside a darkness resides, a black hole of nothingness.
An emptiness that sucks the life force out of you.
A void that whispers: “You are tired of living, give up!”.
The pit of endless sorrow threatens you at every fall.
And now, when I stare into the abyss within…
It stares back at me with its cruel vicious eyes.

It’s funny to see how nothing has changed during this time…

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So to to make it as short as i can..im a 15 year old girl living in a tiny town out in the middle of no where, i have a few friends that are close..but i just finished my freshmen year, and im back almost all my credits because i missed to much school, when i used to get straight A’s the middle school.. because i couldnt even handle getting out of bed everyday, and facing all those happy people, with there boyfriends and girl friends, and there cute clothes, which i cant get only because my size..and all my friends seem to have boyfriends […]

I just feel horrible, just horrible.

I am trapped inside a tunnel with nothing but a small candle to light my way through.

The light was weakened with every step of the way and the darkness threatens to engulf me forever.

She’s upset,
Bad day,
Heads for the dresser drawer to drive the pain away,
Nothing good can come of this,
She opens it, there’s nothing,
There is only leftover tears,
Mum and Dad have no right she screams,
Anger runs down both of her cheeks.

Then she closed her eyes,
Found relief in a knife,
The blood flows as she cries.

All alone the way she feels,
Left alone to deal with,
All the pain drenched sorrowed relief,
Bite the lip just forget the bleeding.

And then she closed her eyes,
Found relief in a knife,
The blood flows as she cries.
Then she closed her eyes,
Found […]

Bieng Bi-Polar is hard for my young friend Gwen not many people understand her like I do.Its hard to have your over at my house and currently were dating which is also complicated. One day in the morning she said that she was going to die today being bi-polar I thought it would blow over but I never thought I would be in for such a big treat Room 224 2nd hour Mrs.**** she hated us that teacher did she would pick on me cause I was the jokester and Gwen hated it she stood up for me and got in trouble I always thanked […]