So as some of you might have realised but i have been off SP for a little while..

I got very suicidal, didnt speak to anyone and put all my energy into surviving the day.

1st june: My baby dsd contacted me today to tell me he wasnt going to bother to see her for her birthday and he will send me some money to buy her something.. Awesome, i had to break the news daddy wasnt coming over and watched her little heart break.

2nd june: My little miss is ill, 40 degree temperature, shes crying, clingy and i dont get a moments peace, shes […]

I wish to finally be killed. To never exist. To forget and just be dead. I’m tired of all of the shit that’s called life. I’m tired of these people who just end up making it worse. Look I’m sorry I’m not the daughter you wanted. I’m sorry I’m not the friend you wanted. I’m sorry I’m not the niece you wanted or the girlfriend or the grand daughter. I guess this is my fault and my fate. My job to fix it my job to correct the mess you’ve made and when I’m done my body will die, this I know. I’m so sorry […]

I dont want to get better, i dont want to do anything, i
have no hopes or aspirations or dream or wants. I wrote a list of things to do
before i die – its come down to watching a tv series, and getting my things in
order. i dont want to travel, or do or see anything now or in the future.
because all those things, would be done as myself, and its myself that is the
problem. if i could have a labotomy, sure then maybe keep going. but without
that, i just dont want to live as this person.

I get my cast off today, after almost 2 months of wearing it.
I am really happy but at the same time I will be checking my phone all day to see if you text me. To see if you remember.
You won’t. But I hope you will.

I’ve become rather pathetic, but hey that’s life.

All things around me are not helping. people , norms, society, even animals .
they are not accepting me , I want to live in a different country or to die in reality instead of dying daily in such place .

I’m gay and have been love with two guys who didn’t care less about me . I ask myself all the time what did I do to get this hell in my life ? I started doubting religion which was my only hope on this unfair life .

why would people be that cruel ? or it’s only me who can’t get along ?

I can’t even […]

nothing. nothing is ever good enough. im never good enough, my bf totally hurt me but im too stupid to get out of the relationship, nothing can make me happy, nothing. im useless and worthless, i cant win any battle so might as well give up maybe at least that can be good enough?

Hello like most of you I was also as well seriously close to committing suicide as I suffer from severe depression and being very lonely. One day I decided to take LSD. I do not know how or why it subdued my pain after taking it but it is extremely effective. I since take LSD every 2-2.5 months per dose and it significantly subdues my pain until the next cycle. To anyone who is close to committing suicide I recommend you give at least this a try if you have tried all the anti-anxiety meds and other various methods but it did not work. If […]

Hi I am Brittany, 23 year old female. I live in the great state of Arizona!

(isn’t it funny that even in the worst state of agony I have ever felt, I still try to put on a happy front.)

Well I could put my whole life story here, BUT thats alot of typing. :p So Ill just try to sum it up and make this short and bitter.

I attempted my first suicide when I was 12 years old, I nearly died. I started taking meds at this time. I have been thru so many things its hard to name them all. I was abandoned by my […]

I’ve planned it all out, you’re my only last hope.

You help me to understand, and help me to cope.

But if this doesn’t work out, I’ll tie a noose with a rope,

And show the whole world, my life was a joke.

Suicide isn’t really an option at this point in time, so then how do you make it all stop hurting?

I’ve been thinking about it for a while now. Years actually. Not just faking death, but just disappearing, to never be found. It’s not really to flee from anything. I’ve done nothing wrong. I just want to start over, new identity, new places. Just vanish overnight and no one will know where I went. I know there is going to be a lot of preparation and planning involved. But I think this is going to be the best means of successfully restarting life.

I’ve contemplated actual suicide and just leaving everything and everyone. But I can’t do it. I’ve never had the strength to end my life. I know some […]

I honestly don’t want to.  But sometimes, I feel like I have to.  It’s as if there’s a little voice in my head, taunting me, telling me I’m not strong enough and that all my problems will go away if I just give up now.  The only way I’ve gotten that little bastard to shut up and let me sleep, yes I’m an insomniac, I’ve found is to just agree with it.  And I’ve been able to lie to myself that this is the only reason why I admit such defeat, but recently I’ve begun to believe it.  I’ve been dealt amazing cards in life, […]

This quote made me think that maybe that’s what it is,maybe get depressed and break down because the pool over flows. It kinda makes sense doesn’t it? Maybe depression is that moment when everything gets flooded and it’s hard to fix all that damage after you survive and suicide,suicide is when you just finally drown in everything. What do you people think?

the song will blow ur heart away where girl realises the boys deepest love & she also starts missing him!!!

I have many problems and always have. I was diagnosed with Manic Depression, Depression, Anorexia, and ADHD. I’m constantly fighting  myself for one normal happy day, although it’s hard it comes around every once in a while. But lately I’ve just felt so lost. I’m not like others, I scream and cry and tell my parents I hate them and I want to kill myself and then 30 minutes later I beg their forgiveness and tell them I’m sorry and I need help. I rarely go to therapists anymore because I never continue to take my medicine and my mom gets fed up with spending time and money on me […]

tune meere jaana

Sit and think
Get your head on straight
Watch the world go by from behind
And take all the time you need

Learn your lessons
Cry away your temporary pain
Understand whatever confusion brought you to this
Strange insanity

(What was it again?)

But I can’t even remember
All thoughts seem to shy away
Like it’s just searching for a nonexistent answer
To all the why’s that I never can seem to place

Sit and think
And then be done
I should, shouldn’t I?
But that’s just a long list of “what if”s …

I’ve always been the last to be pleased. I’m the least favorite. I get picked on, yet people still think I’m strong. I have an older sister ( Bekah ) who I’m always compared to. She’s graduating early, already being the youngest in her class. She’ll be 16 when she graduates. She’s on marching band, plays piano fantasticly, Jesus lover, looking for a job, favorite of my dad, liked by everyone, over-achieving boyfriend, & always has a smile on her face. I LIVE in the shadow of her success. And then I have family issues. My dad is abusive, bipolar, rude, horrible. My mom is […]

I want to die. I am a burden to all those around me. I was just told that I ruined my mothers life. And I don’t want my own life. I feel worthless and even more worthless that I have never gotten even close to succeeding in killing myself. Don’t have the courage.

i went to my friens hoouse today… they dont have the best hous its all small  and everything is crouded with clothes and things on the floorr and drawing s on the wall my friend is doubling and i guess thy dont have that much money… you know what i find interesting about that familly? they dont have everything but when i see them, they always have this big smile … everyones happy… Why am i not happy then?  why cant i be fucking happy?!

today, i came back from my friends house, wearing a tank top and short shorts that my friend gave me… my […]